Archives for April 2009

Apr 15


Hey. I’m blue. I really am. I was hesitant. I’m full of self pity and I admit it. It is what it is.

I’m overwhelmed by so much.

My mom….y’all know about her. She’s amazing and beautiful. And she’s suffering in pain right now. Cancer is consuming her body. It’s so hard to watch.

My dad…I’ve kind of neglected him lately. I haven’t seen him since Christmas. His health is not good, but it’s more of a daily struggle not so much a terminal thing like Mom’s. He has diabetes and depression. The depression is plagueing him at the present time. Hayley Grace and I are going to pick him up tomorrow. It’s his birthday and he’s lonely. I’m thinking that a visit to Charlotte will do him good. While he’s here he will get to go to Hayden’s track meet and Dylan’s baseball game and we will celebrate his birthday. Hayley Grace and I are going to get him tomorrow. I’m so thankful she’s traveling with me.

My kids…all good, but they are involved in so much. Hayley Grace has CheerDance and Hip Hop, Dylan has baseball, Hayden has track, and Blake has CYC (Committed Young Christians).

My husband….Oh my, he rocks. He’s been so loving and supportive of me and my feelings. God love him! He loves me. That isn’t easy.

My friends….if you only knew. They have stepped in and filled in gaps that I was unaware needed filling. Cleaning my house. Bringing meals. Having my carpets cleaned (I’m sure that was the dirtiest water ever seen!). And giving of a mountain house for a weekend getaway or 2. But there are still those friends who also have many needs and are in hard places right now. I so wish I could do more.

My laundry…ugh. It’s ugly. And thankfully my kids don’t mind picking their clean clothes out of the clean clothes basket. Or atleast they don’t complain. Or that I haven’t been cooking much. Hot Pockets and Stouffers have been lifesavers!

My Work…one of the highlights of my life. I get uplifted daily from my coworkers who also happen to be great friends. They surround me with prayer. They also have been filling in for me when I can’t pull my weight around the office. God bless them!!!! They make me take a break and bring laughter to my days. And I get paid!

My Speaking…God help me. I have an event in 2 weeks and I feel so unprepared. The theme is “Leaving An Eternal Legacy”. This has never meant more to me than it does right now. My mom has left a legacy and I’m so aware of that now. I never was before because I had no fear of losing her. She was here. I didn’t think of her as a memory. Now, I think of what I can keep of her. What parts of her I can hang on to. Her legacy is huge to me now. This event will be too. I just know God has the plans. I just wish I had them. I also have 2 other events in May. One at my family’s church in Greenville, SC and one here in Charlotte where many of my friends will be in attendance.

My Email…I get so many loving emails each day. And I also receive the Proverbs 31 prayer requests each day too. It’s so hard because I can’t respond to all of my emails. I try, but I fail. That is hard for me. Also the prayer requests we receive each day at Proverbs is so hard. I love these people. I love them. I care for them. I wish I could respond to each one, but I can’t. I do read them though. And I send them to our prayer team. But I wish I could connect with them. Just have to trust God that He will take care of them.

So, tonight….I’m blue. I’m frustrated. I’m tired. I want to have some time alone. I want to read and write. I guess also, I’m selfish.

That’s where God comes in. He provides. Whatever I need, He provides. For today. And that’s all I ask.

Blue for today but strength, peace, and love to make it through the day and whatever tomorrow may bring.

Thank you so much for your prayers and love.


*****Edit on April 15th…..
My friends, I love you so much. Thank you for your prayers. I read back over my post. Oh my, I’m so sorry I was having such a pity party!!!!! And I was! But that’s really where I was. And kind of still am, but the good news is that I know better than I feel. Thank you for your prayers, love, and care.

Apr 9

Heading to the Mountains…Happy Easter

My family and I are going out of town for Easter weekend…and we need it! We’ve been under a lot of stress and trials lately and this will be a welcome get away….made possible by our great friends Kenny and Denise.

You may remember a few months ago, Jeff and I had an amazing weekend away together in the mountains. It was at K and D’s mtn house. Well, tomorrow we are going back to the same place, only this time with the kids and Princess too. We are so excited! We have movies picked out to watch, games to play, hikes to go on, places to visit, and beautiful views to view from our private balcony!

We will be returning Sunday and attending Easter Sunday service at our church on Sunday evening. I’m so thankful they are having an evening service!Wherever you are and whatever you do, I pray that you will have a blessed Easter. Please take the time to celebrate Jesus, the risen Christ. We are free because of Him and what He did for us.

We will be hunting for eggs, making cookies, and awaiting the Easter Bunny….but we will be celebrating our sins being forgiven most of all. Thank you Jesus! I love you so much. You have made my life possible and worthwhile. You have given me purpose and allowed me to fail and bounce back. Thank you so much.

Happy Easter Y’all!
He is risen!


Apr 7

I Rule Scramble on FaceBook

Tonight I only wish you could’ve been in my house. Oh, if you were you would have heard me scream, seen me dance, and observed me gloating.

Now, I’m not typically a competitive person. I don’t challenge anyone to a game, duel, or anything else. I’m not a risk taker. I get nervous when competing with someone. I get nervous when under pressure or timed. But I do love to play games. And I’m a very gracious loser. “Congrats. Great game.” However….

When I win………..”In your face! Move over sucker! Uh huh uh huh. I rock! Take that! Whoo Hoo! Oh yea baby!” It’s sad really. When I win, I get totally obnoxious. And I got to get obnoxious tonight.

My friend at work, Samantha, introduced me to Scramble. This is a game on FaceBook that is exactly like Boggle only it’s on the computer. I love it and play it way too much. And until tonight I’ve been perfectly content to be in the middle of the pack among my friends who play Scramble. Samantha has been at the top of my friends, with the highest score for quite some time. She was proud to hold that title. Until a few weeks ago, another friend of mine, Michelle, knocked her off the top. In fact, Michelle’s score was so high, we didn’t think it was possible. No way anyone could score 168….no way.

I remember the first time I broke a 100 on Scramble. It was a sweet personal victory. Then there was the 139. I thought there was no way I could top that. Then I hit 158. Well that was definitely the top for me. I ranked 3rd among my friends. Michelle was 1st, Samantha was 2nd, and I was 3rd. Not no mo!!!!!!!!!! I’m #1!!!

Yes I am. Tonight I scored a 178!!!! Oh if you only knew how impossible this was. I know I shouldn’t brag, but I am. When the final score was revealed I screamed and danced around the room. I sang a song in honor of myself. My family ran to see what the heck was happening. I showed them. Then I published my score on my FaceBook wall for all to see. Well, I did that after texting Samantha and sending her a message on FB. She’s so good with words, I can’t believe I beat her. But I did. Oh yea, I did.

Well, this post really has nothing inspiring, spiritual, or uplifting in it. It’s totally selfish and prideful.

And I’m okay with that. I don’t rule a whole lot, but I rule Scramble on FaceBook!

Love ya!

***Correction I scored 179, not 178!!!! :)