Archives for February 2010

Feb 11

Bittersweet Moments to Treasure

You may not know, but my mother, Becky Nunn, was diagnosed with lung cancer in October, 2008.  At the time of her diagnosis, the doctor said without treatment, she might live 6 months.  With treatment, maybe a year.  It’s been quite a difficult journey:  chemo, surgeries, loss of hair, growth of hair, happy times, sad times, very difficult times, and overall a time that no one could ever prepare for.  I’ve known people who have travelled this journey, but never did I imagine how difficult it was.

I started a CaringBridge site for my mom.  It’s a place where her friends, family, and even fans (many of you)  keep up with her health and condition.  Today, I decided to share here on my blog, my latest post on CaringBridge.  Here it is.

Hey there.  How’s everyone doing today?  Hopefully wherever you are you are enjoying your day.  I know I am.  Although it’s been very quiet today, it’s been nice.  I’m spending the day and night with Mom. Very thankful to be here.

Mom had a great visit with her friend Margaret last Saturday.  Margaret brought pictures of some of their fun times together and also brought dinner.  Mom and Bud both enjoyed her visit.  It was great to see her, it had been way too long!  Tomorrow Ruth and Opal are coming.  She’s looking forward to that too.  Her friends are cherished treasures.

She’s been very quiet today.  I noticed last time I was here she wasn’t talking as much.  She is content, just quiet.  She has dozed on and off all day.  

It’s a bittersweet thing to watch your Mom in this situation. Some of you know what I’m talking about.  There’s a deep sadness watching someone’s life decline.  Sometimes there is peace with watching this process. And sometimes there is profound sadness.  I find myself looking back over our lifetime of memories together a lot when I’m sitting with her.  I think of my favorite meals she’s made me.  I think of trips we’ve taken.  Silly times.  Happy times.  Hard times.  Life times.  And how on the one hand I’m not ready for those to end.  But then again, I know there is a better life awaiting her ahead.  People tell me the phase of “letting go” will come when it’s time.  It’s not time yet, thankfully!  Can’t you tell I’ve been in deep thought?Reflective.  (It doesn’t help that Celine is singing a slow song about love and family on Oprah right now as I write this!)  Needless to say, the time spent together is priceless.  I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again, “Love those around you with an active love.  Enjoy your time together and don’t pass up an opportunity to say ‘I love you.'”

Well, Mom just perked up.  “Ellen” just came on and it’s making her laugh :)  I love that sound!

God Bless You!

Thanks for allowing me to share a portion of my journey with you.  Have a beautiful day :)

Feb 10

Top 10 Ways To Love Your Husband

Top 10 Ways To Love Your Husband

by Melissa Taylor

10.  Tell him every day that you love him.  Every day.  At least 3 times a day.  Speak it. Text it. FaceBook it.  Tweet it.  But make sure he hears it and he knows it.

9.  Do something for him in secret.  Don’t worry about getting credit for it or if he notices.  Just keep it between you and the Lord.  Find joy in doing something kind or helpful, yet secretive for him.

8.  Have sex with him. (I know you just rolled your eyes at me!)  Blunt:  yes.  Unnecessary:  no   Most men need this from their wives and most women are often too exhausted to have this at the top of their priority list.  You know your man better than anyone else.  Only you can give him the gift of you.  Share yourself with your husband and ask the Lord to bless the bed of your marriage.

7.  Read The Husband Project by Kathi Lipp and dedicate 21 days to loving your man with purpose and intention.  This book blessed me, my husband and our marriage so much! I was especially surprised by how I fell more in love I felt while going through the projects. Grab a few girlfriends and do this together! That’s what I did. I loved it so much that it’s the next Proverbs 31 Online Bible Study. (The study begins June 20, 2016- why don’t you join me?)

6.  Read 1 Corinthians 13 and write down the qualities of love mentioned in this chapter.  Ask yourself:  Do I love my husband this way?  Then ask God to give you His supernatural ability to love.  Because I’ll just say it plain and simple, there is nothing natural about love. It’s not a feeling, it’s an action…one you have to decide to have and give.

5.  Date him.  If he’s not into planning a date, then do it yourself.  Make time for your relationship away from the grind and routine of every day life.  This doesn’t require money, it only requires time.  My last date with my husband took place at our home.  We had dinner alone and listened to our favorite music.  We gave each other massages.  We did some other things too, but I’ll skip that part!  We ended the night by watching a movie in bed together.  He said it was the perfect date!   On another date, we met for lunch while the kids were in school.  Once we sat on our back patio and cooked out together.  Every date is different and depends on the circumstances, but I personally think this is vital to a marriage.

4.  Allow your husband to overhear you telling someone something great about him!  Compliment him in front of your family and/or friends.  Never speak negatively of him in front of  others.

3.  Learn your husband’s love language.  Often the biggest barrier in a marriage relationship is just failing to know the way you and your spouse like to give and receive love.  Sadly, my husband and I didn’t learn this until we had been married 18 years.  My #1 love language was his #6.  His #1 love language was my #6.  Think we had a problem here?  Uh huh.  But it wasn’t a problem that couldn’t be worked on.  We just both needed to apply effort in the way we gave love to each other.  (Love Languages:  Words: written or spoken, Touch:  non sexual, Touch:  sexual, Quality time, Gifts, Acts of service)

2.  Forgive yourself for anything in your past that may keep you from loving your husband completely.  Forgive your husband the same. It’s never too late to start anew.

1.  Pray for your husband.  Make this your #1 priority in your marriage.  Even if you don’t feel like it, do it anyway.  Too often prayer is considered what you do when all else fails.  Maybe all else wouldn’t fail if we prayed first.  Just sayin’….

This post is dedicated in honor of my husband, Jeff.  Today is our 20th wedding anniversary. I love you sweetheart! Thanks for being patient with me as I learn each year how to love you even better. The best is yet to come!

Feb 9

A Pain in the Foot!

Two years ago I had bunion surgery, which you can read about here. It was painful, but necessary and after the 4 months + of recovery I was really glad I did it.  During that recovery time, one of the things I missed the most was running.

For me, my daily runs became an escape from the world.  It was my time, spent in the fresh air (as fresh as you can get living in the city!), listening to my music on my iPod, and I loved every minute of it.  My usual run took me about 4.5 miles.  A couple times a week I would do a longer run of 9 miles.  It was refreshing and rejuvenating for me, so you can see why I couldn’t wait to begin running again.

When I started back, I had a few issues that were holding me back.  First of all, I had put on quite a bit of weight.  My knees and ankles weren’t exactly thrilled for the extra baggage they were now supporting.  Even more than that though, my right foot (not my bunion foot) ached severely.  Not only did it hurt during my runs (or walks which had become my norm) but it also hurt afterwards.   Assuming it had to be my shoes, I bought new running shoes.  Foot still hurt.  I tried cushioned inserts. Nope, didn’t work either.  I decided the extra weight must be the problem and I would just have to endure.  And I did for 14 months.  I exercised less and limped more.  I also ate more, because I gained more weight…but that’s another story.

Jump ahead to now.  I finally went to the doctor after a co-worker scared me into thinking I had gout.  What I learned is that I did not have gout, but I did have a severe foot problem:   plantar fasciitis. From Google Health:

Plantar fasciitis is irritation and swelling of the thick tissue on the bottom of the foot.

The most common complaint is pain in the bottom of the heel. It is usually worst in the morning and may improve throughout the day. By the end of the day the pain may be replaced by a dull aching that improves with rest.

Most people complain of increased heel pain after walking for a long period of time.

Conservative treatment is almost always successful, given enough time. Treatment can last from several months to 2 years before symptoms get better. Most patients will be better in 9 months.

Initial treatment usually consists of:

  • Anti-inflammatory medications
  • Heel stretching exercises
  • Night splints
  • Shoe inserts

If these fail, putting the affected foot in a short leg cast (a cast up to but not above the knee) for 3-6 weeks is very often successful in reducing pain and inflammation. Alternatively, a cast boot (which looks like a ski boot) may be used. It is still worn full time, but can be removed for bathing.

This information did not make me a happy camper at all.  In fact at first I was quite discouraged.  I wanted something that had a quick fix or at least a sure fire solution, like my bunion surgery was.  Instead, I’ve learned I’m stuck with months of special exercises, night splints (which I began wearing this week), and soon to get shoe inserts.  No open shoes for me, which rules out my FAVORITES, flip flops!

Ordinarily, I’d use this as another excuse to not exercise and put off losing weight.  Not this time.  My Jillian Michael’s 30 Day Shred workout is plantar faciitis friendly and Weight Watchers is working wonderfully for me.  If the worst part of this is wearing night splints and enduring a slight change of pace, I consider myself lucky.  Watching my own mother suffer from cancer has enabled me to put things in perspective more easily now.

So, that’s just another thing going on in the ever so exciting and exhausting life of Melissa Taylor.  If anyone has any thing to share about plantar fasciitis or some helpful suggestions for enduring the healing process, I’d love to hear them!

***FYI, for those of you following, I finished the New Testament!  I’ll update on what’s next soon :)

Have a wonderful day and God Bless You!