Archives for March 2010

Mar 31

A Message from Mom

As promised, I’m putting the Eulogies from Mom’s funeral on my blog.  If you missed yesterday’s, please go back and read it. It was Becca’s words written and spoken for her beloved “MawMaw”.  I said I was going to post Blake’s today, but have decided to wait and post his tomorrow.  Instead, today you’ll be reading the words that I spoke.

A Message from Mom…

First, I just have to say how much all of you have meant to our family.  We love you and know you loved Becky.

I stand here today not to tell you what my mother meant to me or how wonderful of a woman she was.  I hope you already know that.  I stand her today to give you a message from her.  This is what she wants you to know.

Mom and I had a lot of time together over the past 1 ½ years.  We took time to talk and dream.  I asked her if she could impart any wisdom to others, what would it be?  She said, “2 things”:

1. Don’t place your faith in things of this world.  All of them are temporary.  As someone who knew she was dying, Mom learned that only God could provide everything she needs.  Nothing else made her feel at peace but God.  There’s a reason for that.  She knew that what God offered was real…it  was permanent…and no one could take it away.  And she’s right.  Here are a few verses from God’s Word that have really helped us, specifically Mom, over the past few months:

Joshua 1:9- “Have I not commanded you, “Be strong and courageous.  Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”  The fact that Mom knew God was with her, was all the courage she needed.  And her courage in these last few months has been a beautiful example to us all.

Denise Hammond, a dear friend to our family, shared another passage of Scripture with us that brought strength and peace.

Psalm 73:23-26, “Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand.  You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory…  My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”  Becky wants all of you to know that she was able to face this because of God.  She didn’t die scared.  She cried because she didn’t want to leave all of us.  But she had peace knowing that God would be with her to carry her into glory.  She said she’d tried to find peace like that, but never found it until she decided to trust the Lord.

2. Don’t smoke.  She really struggled with guilt over her lung cancer.  It could have been prevented.  Knowing that, she hopes that through her life, someone else’s life will be saved.  She was never preachy about it, but she doesn’t want anyone to suffer like she did. And she doesn’t want anyone’s family to suffer like hers has.  Eventually she came to terms with it.  And again, we find hope and strength in God’s Word.  Philippians 1:18-20 sums up the joy she was able to find through her suffering:

“Yes, and I will continue to rejoice, for I know that through your prayers and the help given by the Spirit of Jesus Christ, what has happened to me will turn out for my deliverance.  I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death.”

In her death, we hope you have seen Jesus.

Other things we discussed:

Mom’s favorite word:  Hope.

Word that describes her best:  Courage.

Favorite flower: Yellow Tose

Favorite color:  Purple

Favorite Sport: Football

Favorite vacation spot: Ocean Drive

Proudest moment: The births of her kids and grandkids.

Her Loves:

Buddy.

Maggie. (her dog)

Shagging.

Laughing with friends.

Her family.

Kings Gate in Florida.

Pepperidge Farm Apple Turnovers.

The Gamecocks.  (and she was thrilled that the last USC/Clemson game she got to see, the Gamecocks won.)

Thank you all so much for coming today to remember Becky Nunn.  If she were here, she would tell you not only to remember her, but to celebrate life.

Besides our friends and family, I’d also like to thank those that cared for Mom during her illness.  Dr. Pamela Sinclair and her staff at Cancer Specialty Center, various doctors and nurses at Carolinas Medical Center, and most of all Agape Hospice here in Rock Hill.  Margaret and Pat, Mom’s nurses from Hospice meant so much to Mom and our family.  These women are truly gifts from God and we will never forget them.

Finally I’d like to share with you what Mom shared with me as her #1 life lesson: And I quote her on this,  “Cherish each and every day.  Love your family while you’re with them.”

Praying you will indeed cherish today and love those you are with.

Melissa
Mar 30

My MawMaw by Becca

My niece, Becca, spoke these words at her grandmother’s funeral.

My Mawmaw

I remember a lot of things about my Mawmaw. She was a big part of my life, and I will miss her a lot. I have a lot of good memories with my Mawmaw.

We went to a campsite together along with my Pawpaw and their dog, Maggie. It was soooo much fun that I will remember it all my life, and remember my favorite Mawmaw, and being her “little Becca.” By the way, I was named after her (Rebecca Ross.)

Mawmaw was a huge impact in my life, and I will feel like apart of me is empty because I will never be able to talk to her on the phone or see her when we go to visit. But I know that she is in a much better place right now, and she is probably teaching Jesus how to shag dance. My Mawmaw was and still is my favorite person in my WHOLE LIFE! (besides my mom)

Becca is 11 years old and lives in Dallas, TX with her parents and little sister.  Her mother is my sister, Tricia.  I was so proud of Becca.  It took great courage to get up and share her heart in front of so many people.  Her grandmother was for sure smiling down on her from Heaven.

****Tomorrow I’ll feature the words that my son, Blake, spoke at his grandmother’s service and on Thursday, I’ll post what I shared.  I hope by reading these eulogies you will get a glimpse into the beautiful life of Becky Nunn and also take away a few nuggets of wisdom and blessing.

Melissa
Mar 27

The Details Side of Death

This whole death process has taught me a lot.  This is the first death in my life where I planned or needed to carry out some of the details associated with it. I’ve been told that I’m calm and level-headed. I’m not so sure about that, but the Lord has given me the ability to feel pain and sadness but also do what needs to be done.  It’s surprised even me because I am not detail oriented in my every day life.  Even though during the last week of Mom’s life and the day of her death, I wanted to fall apart and not think about all the many details to follow, my body and mind kicked into a different gear and allowed me to separate from my emotions and get things done.

Meeting with the funeral director was one of the hardest.  My husband, Jeff, went with me and we sat in a conference room that contained flowers and caskets.  This was just hours after Mom died.  Even though Mom made sure her funeral was paid for and she let us know that she wanted a traditional southern viewing and service, the details still needed to be made.  Selecting the spray of flowers.  Selecting pictures for the DVD that is being made.  Going into the room where her viewing will take place and deciding where the family would stand to greet friends as they passed through to share their well wishes and take one final look at Mom.  Going into the chapel where her service will be held.  Bringing her clothes that she will be wearing in her casket.  Her jewelry.  Telling those in charge how she liked her make up and hair.  It was sort of an out of body experience.  It had to be in order to get through it because the moment I thought about all of this being for MY MOTHER, I would tear up and cry.  It just can’t be happening. But I know it is. :(

Yesterday, I spoke with the minister to go over the order of the service. Reverend Mike Black, a Baptist minister and my Mom’s next door neighbor and friend is officiating.  He is wonderful and has been instrumental in assuring my Mom and her husband that God was with them all the time.  My mother’s faith grew by leaps and bounds because of this man.  He is a wonderful man and Mom was so happy that he would be doing her service.  My son, Blake, my niece, Becca, and I will also be speaking at Mom’s service.  Mom’s 2 favorite hymns, Amazing Grace and What A Friend We Have in Jesus will also be sung.  It will be a celebration of her life and I’m sure I’ll be writing more about it in the coming week.

Today I have one more detail to take care of and I think it will be one of the toughest.  I will be going to the funeral home to give approval on how my mom looks.  Jeff is going with me.  My sister hasn’t decided if she can and I completely understand that.  I have to look at these final tasks as ways that I am still serving Mom and also serving our family and God.  In that sense it is an honor.  But it’s still hard.

The night before Mom went to be with Jesus, I wrote her obituary.  I’ll post that tomorrow.

So many have asked what they can do for me?  Well I’ll tell you.  Go hug the special ones in your life right now.  Tell them you love them.  If they aren’t in your home, call them.  Then do it again tomorrow. More than anything I miss the sound of my mother’s voice telling me she loves me.

Melissa