Oct 18

Can I Be Honest With You?

Of course I can.  If you’ve ever read my blog before, you know that what you see is what you get. I’m just an everyday ordinary  Carolina girl with her share of life struggles and blessings. Nothing extra special or stand outish about me.  And I like it that way.

It’s been another typical week in life. A doctor visit for psoriasis treatment. A death in the family of a very close friend. A football game. Working concessions at another football game…I can serve some mean nachos by the way. A soccer game. An overnight trip with my family to attend a funeral. Laundry. Laundry. Grocery shopping. Laughter. Tears. And more laundry.

Just last week, I found myself saying on more than one occasion, “There has got to be more to life than this.”  I was referring to the everyday tasks that seem to have no end.  It seems like life is just one task after another from sun up to sun down, only to go to bed, wake up and do it all over again. I don’t know about you, but I’m tired and overwhelmed. Lately there is no decision making involved in my life because there is too much that I have to do.  Please don’t think I’m ungrateful. I’m not. In fact, I wouldn’t trade the reasons I have all these tasks for anything in the world. I suspect that most women are overworked. And the ones who aren’t usually wish they had more to do! I talked to one friend last week who is bored with life. We laughed because she wanted what I had and I wanted what she had. Are we never satisfied I ask you?  ha ha, I guess we never will be until we get to Heaven. Speaking of Heaven….

An amazing man began his journey there last Thursday. Tom Oliver, the step father (although he was more like a real father) to one of my best friends, found out just 3 weeks ago that he had cancer. He was a wonderful husband, father, grandfather, and friend to all who knew him. Just a month ago, he was traveling with his beautiful wife, clueless that his body was beginning to shut down. It was a shock, but not a devastation. After attending Tom’s funeral and talking with the people who knew him best I left with a fresh look and a new appreciation of life. Tom was not afraid to die and he was grateful for the life he had lived. It was bitter sweet. The tears were purely selfish; he will be sorely missed. There will be a void in the lives of his loved ones, especially his wife and kids. But I also witnessed a celebration. A celebration of a life well lived and a celebration of a life now lived in eternity with God.

Today, I am not viewing my life as a series of tasks. Although, the tasks continue, for today I am grateful. My heart is beating and I am alive. That must mean the Lord has plans for me. Who can I invest in today? That’s how I will view my tasks. They are investments I’m making in others. They are blessings. If one “task” was removed, there would be a void.  Not to say that a cleaning lady is welcome to enter my life any time, but until that happens, I will gratefully clean the toilets, wash the clothes, go to work, etc and do it all over again. My mindset is what needs to change, not my life.

Just being honest, I want an easier life. Just being honest, I’m thankful for the life I’ve been given. Just being honest, I am blessed.

Love and Blessings,



  1. I absolutely adore your honesty! I find it refreshing… thank you so much for being so candid and transparent in your blog. And I think about you and keep you in my prayers as your journey continues with grieving the loss of your mother. I love your blog and words of encouragement!

  2. Hi Melissa,

    I think every woman endures moments like this. I know I can sure relate! What I appreciate about your post is that you point out that WE need to change–not our circumstances.

    Thankful with you, girl!

    P.S. I’m totally looking forward to your Next Step call tonight! :)

  3. You must have been reading my mind and my heart! I, too, get discouraged with the everyday in and outs, everyday being the same, everyday doing it all again. I often feel like everything in my life is a have to not a want to. When I am having these days or week, I keep telling myself, that I have so much to be thankful for. I will even write down some things that I am thankful for and read it over and over again. And most importantly, I tell my husband how I am feeling. I want an easier life too. Hmmm, the cleaning lady I don’t have would make mine easier! Thank you for sharing your heart. So many of us women need to know we are not alone in the way we feel.

  4. Well considered and written, dear friend!

    See you Wednesday,

  5. Just being honest, walking a similar journey and sharing your thoughts.
    Love & hugs,

  6. Thank you sweet friend for bein’ honest. I need to see my tasks anew as well. Yes girl, God does have plans for you. After 17 years of friendship I think I can confidently say one of them is to be a light, especially to all us girls. Thank you again for your wisdom and enlightenment. (And friendship!)

  7. Just being honest… I want to mirror more the life of Tom than my current way of living… carpe diem my friend … this is the day the Lord has made and I DO REJOICE in it and so do u!!! Thanks for writing such a beautiful reminder and memorial for Tom! xoxoxoxxo D

  8. Thanks for writing this Melissa. Very nice….so sorry Denise. :(

  9. I think we all have these same feelings a lot of times. Somedays are so hard. But walking with Him makes it so much sweeter. Been missing you- one reason that I like your blog is because you are honest and real.

  10. Carol Richards says:

    Wow…I throughly enjoyed today’s article….it spoke volumes to me. I appreciate your transparency……..as Christians we are usually hide, cover, or pretend we’re someplace else for fear of being viewed negatively for making such statements. “Can I be honest you” paraphrased “Can I be REAL with you”……..yes you can! I can remember on many occasions in different seasons of my life uttering those same words…..it’s a reflection, an assessment of who, what, when, where and why. God does understand, Christians need to lighten up and be REAL……Thank-you Sister Melissa

  11. Melissa, as always thank you for being honest, real, transparent. What a refreshing (Although you don’t feel that way and I’m lifting you up to our Heavenly Father to give you an extra measure of strength and endurance for the race!) reminder for us to review and view our daily tasks as blessings to be about “as unto the Lord.” I am so very blessed and can easily take for granted what God has graciously given me and your constant reminders and reflections of truth and being real are a check for me to ask myself, what am I doing for others, what am I doing today, right now for the Lord, to further His work, His Kingdom purposes. Yes, thank you for being real and honest with us. It certainly helps keep me accountable and humble.

    Sweet Blessings and prayers for you.

  12. Great post Melissa! I was just thinking today that I want “out of this rat race”. I want to really value the time I get to spend with other people (even people I’ve just met at the grocery store, etc.). I feel like I’m always in a rush & I know that’s how so many other women feel – especially those of us who are trying do it all! One word keeps coming to my mind today and that is “Simplify”.