Mar 29

Congratulations! You are facing fear.

I’ve been congratulated for many things over the course of my 45 year  life. A good report card. Getting married. Having a baby. Buying a new home. Getting a new job. A job well done. Winning a game.

Yes, I’ve been congratulated for various accomplishments, but I don’t think I’ve even been congratulated for facing fear . But I kind of think I should. Don’t you?

I want to take a moment and celebrate with you because you have decided to face fear too!  CONGRATULATIONS!  We can’t conquer fear until we actually decide to face our fear.

So here we are, already achieving Step #1, Facing our fear.

How does it feel?


I’m joking about the scary part of course, well kind of.

The truth is, facing fear is a little scary. It takes courage. It takes guts. It takes honesty. It takes action. I’m so proud of all of us for taking this action by signing up to do this Bible study.

If you are used to living with fear, don’t expect it to go away automatically. It will take time as you learn to place God’s Truth in your mind and heart to replace the fear/uncertainty/doubt/ you are used to having. It takes practice.

Practice. Football teams must practice if they ever expect to win a game. Artists must practice drawing/painting/sculpting/singing/playing music  if they ever expect to achieve greatness. Students must practice their multiplication facts if they ever expect to win the math game in school. (Hayley Grace told me to put that one in!)  Anyway, you get my point.  Just like with anything, by practicing something we tend to get better at it.

Practice spending daily time in God’s Word. Make time for your Bible study. Don’t allow distractions or busyness to get in your way. And especially don’t let fear block you from moving forward. Fear be gone! We got places to go where you aren’t invited!

Here is a letter from your Father. Listen to what He has to say to you about fighting for your faith and letting go of your fear.

Beloved Princess,

It’s time to surrender your fears, your insecurities, your pain, and even your loved ones completely to Me. I want your whole heart and mind and soul to be worry-free. I want your complete trust so you can focus on your faith and be free of the spirit of fear controlling you. Give up the fight of trying to figure it all out. Don’t let your circumstances hold your heart hostage or cause you to lose your confidence in Me. I am asking you on this day to answer this one question: In whom do you place your trust?


Your trustworthy King

****from Freedom For His Princess, by Sheri Rose Shepherd


So, how are you doing ladies?  How’s the first week going for you?  Leave me a comment and let me know!

And again, let me congratulate you! You are doing a good thing!







  1. Thanks, Melissa, for the prayer from our Trustworthy King!! It hits a chord in my heart that needs touching today. <3

  2. Thank you so much …. I needed to read this … My fear is that my husband will cheat on me again …There’s time’s that the devil start’s putting stuff in my mind ..Which I know is not true ..Cause God is restoring our marriage ..We are now trying to serve God .. If you could pray for me and my marriage , family


    • Jenny Kozar says:

      Oh Veronica – I know EXACTLY what you are feeling as this has lead to my anxiety over the last year. In this short time of our study I have decided that I am choosing to be happy. I am choosing to believe that my marriage is restored, I am choosing that it is in God’s hands and there is honeslty nothing I can do or control if my husband chooses to be unfaithful again. It is his choice and not mine. It is not about me but about his own short comings. Right now I know I could not handle it if it happens again but with God I am believing and standing on his promise that He has plands for me that are good. He has them for you too.

      • Sarah Rose says:

        I wanted to let you know that I too have the horrifying fear of my husband going out of the boundaries of our marriage again. I just want you to know that we are overcomers! The Bible says that the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God can overcome! Whether it be fear, hurt, or restoring our marriages, God is cheering us on. And Jenny…I LOVED your words too. We can only do so much as wives. We submit to God, submit to our husbands, and the rest it out of our hands. Jenny, I think you are a wise woman! I will be praying for all three of us as we work on letting go of the fear of having to reface that hurt. Love, Sarah

    • To all three of you ladies….I am right there with you and it bring tears to my eyes to read your stories and to know that I am not alone. Thank you for sharing! This Bible study came at the perfect time for me. We can do it ladies! We can be free from our fears, with His help and guidance.
      Praying for us all! :)

      • Michelle N says:

        Wow. Not only was your message timely for me today Melissa – Veronica, Jenny, Sarah and Lindsey thank you for your replies. I too am in a marriage where infidelity has been a factor and have been consumer before with the fear of it happening again. I just said to my minister this week that I was going to use this study to let the fear go because I could not control what he would do. I needed to believe in my marriage and trust in God to guide me along the path. Thank you for being so courageous to not only face it but to post it as well. Knowing I have sisters here confronting the same fear with me is comforting as well. In you I place my complete trust God. I will NOT allow my heart to be held hostage ANY longer because you paid the ransom with the sacrifice of your son. WOW! What an awesome God we have. I am moved to tears of relief and grateful ness.

        Thank you Melissa.

    • I love that you are choosing to believe that God is restoring your marriage because He can’t unless you believe it. Praying for your marriage.

  3. Jenny Kozar says:

    Thank you so much for the beautiful love letter! I am feeling amazingly calm – while doing the Chapter 2 questions today, I felt God’s presence with me and felt NO fear!!! Today I am praying on and off when I feel the anxiety coming – our memory verse from 2 Timothy and know that it is not from God that these fears and being whispered to me but from the enemy, the teller of only lies.

    Blessings, Jenny

  4. Thank you for that beautiful love letter! It is just what I needed today. I have several fears but my biggest fear is food. I am afraid certain foods will make me sick and I know I have let that crazy fear take root and it is non sense. So after I read the love letter I decided I am going to put all my trust in my King even if I have to do it every second of each day!

    Jesus Bless you!

    • hi Maria, i know that fear. i have so many food sensitivities that i dont eat out anymore, i dont even go to friends houses to eat because its too hard to remember all the things that set me off.
      i have lots of fears but getting sick is probably one of my biggest – be it from food, viruses or something major like cancer.
      food is simply one that plagues me on a daily basis. i want to give it to God, and im trying to work out how to do that and still put in enough effort to make sur e i dont get sick. i guess sometimes i see things as being an earthly responsibility – like not letting people cook for me very often and being very careful about what i eat etc – take charge of my own basic health problems. and other things i see as Godly responibilities, god, let this test come back negative or help me im scared, or lord help this homeless person because i cant at the moment. they are just a few examples. but i think thats something i need help on. rememberin god is interested in everything not just the big things.

  5. Sarah Rose says:

    I have to share that I’m just amazed at how much God is building my trust. I still feel the fear and anxiety, but I am turning to Scripture and prayer during those times and choosing to believe the truth. I will honestly say I may not even feel the feeling to back it up, but I’m choosing truth over fear with the help of God, and things are a-changing!

    • Sarah Rose,
      I could have written what you wrote here!!!

      I have anxiety and I think what brings me peace about having anxiety is that I know I can trust God!

      • I too fight anxiety & am amazed by how much this study is bringing to my attention of fears I’m living in… having to back up & find the fears I’ve overcome 😉 b/c I was sure there were some somewhere! Anxiety building, though reading through different posts here & on Facebook were so helpful to bring me back to trusting in God – reading our memory verse & overcoming with worship & prayer each moment. We can do this!

  6. Carolyn Johnson says:

    From the bottom of my heart….Thank you for this study! Can’t wait to start the lesson for today! Oh, God calm my anxious heart that has produced high blood pressure, insecurity, worry, etc! II know that the King is speaking directly to me!


  7. Meg Kincheloe says:

    I just have to say that I am thrilled to be a part of this study. Melissa, I have listened to several of your conference calls and I love your sweet and gentle spirit. I have been so inspired already by the lovely ladies in my FB group and already feel the Holy Spirit working in me to remove some fears (which is CRAZY considering how long I have been burdened by some of them!). Thank you for all you do!

  8. My first week has been tough! Yesterday was horrible, I went home from work and cried like a baby! Today is much better!

    • Keep working at it Michelle! God has great things in store for you. I had a rough day yesterday too & there were plenty of tears but then God showed up in a big way & helped me to see some things that he’s been trying to get me to look at for a long time now. Today is a new day & you’re going to get there!

    • Hold on, Michelle! Don’t be discouraged! We are not going to conquer our fears without some opposition. Satan doesn’t give up that easy. Especially if your fears have been a stronghold for a long time. Sunday, Monday and Tuesday were horrible for me. I also cried like a baby and was having trouble sleeping. I finally enlisted my prayer partner to pray some peace over me and have felt much better. Just take one day at a time, girlfriend!

  9. I love the post Melissa! The letter from our Father is just perfect! Fear, that’s that’s been a big thing for me for a LONG time but I’m happy to report that through this study God is already working on with my fears. I had a big moment yesterday while working on the chapter 2 questions, the first question actually. That one question took me all of 2 hours to finish. It was just that much of what I needed to look at, really look at on a very deep level. So I did take the time to look at all the parts of why I believe Satans lies over God’s truths & God showed me some amazing awesome things through the time that I took for just that one question. I’ll tell you, as soon as I read the question, I started crying & I cried for a good while. The whole time I was thinking about all of the lies that I’ve always believed as my truth & I realized that none of those have ever been my truth. God showed me where & what my truth is & who that truth is with. I’m so thankful for this study & it’s just the first week. It’s only getting better from here!I can’t wait to see where God is going to take me next. I know that I will still continue to struggle with this from time to time, but now I can say that I fully believe that I am all of the truths that God says I am.
    Loving the study Melissa! So thankful to you & the entire P31 team!

    • Amen Tricia! Hang on to the truths and the courage to step in faith each day and each moment! God does have a plan for you and will take you through it to fulfill what He wants for you and your life. <3

  10. The beginning was kind of shaky for me. My fear is my 5 year old daughter having a relapse from cancer ( she spent last year in treatment). And right before starting she got sick with bronchitis and was having nose bleeds, and there goes my mind again running wild with thoughts. She is doing better now and I find myself quoting scripture more often and praying more often and it truly quiets my mind and soul. So thankful for this study, I truly feel that God brought this at the perfect moment!!!

  11. I am a wife and mother of two boys, ages 12 & 15. As I mother, I have struggled with sometimes paralyzing fear for my children – their safety, their health, their future. It is such a comforting thought to know that God is an “ever-present” (Psalms 46:1) help – not just for me, but for my boys also! Praise God for that!


    • I can relate to you struggling with the overpowering fear for your children. I too suffer from that at times –this past Sunday in church (yes, while sitting right there in the chair with the preacher preaching about God watching over me) I almost succombed to the urge to RUN to the preschool room and check on my 3 year old. I know that it is Satan trying to use my thoughts to keep me from growing closer to God.
      “I will say of the Lord – He is my refuge and my fortress, my God in Him I will trust” Psalm 91:2
      And… that’s what I did on Sunday morning – The service was wonderful and my little one was perfectly fine!

    • Angela,
      As a mom, I can relate to the worry and fear for our children. Just recently 2 of mine were going through some tough situations. My football/lacrosse playing child, Hayden, had a neck injury. He was so upset and it took x-rays, MRIs, physical therapy to diagnose and heal. I was so worried he couldn’t play sports again and I know how he loves it. Then Dylan, who has an anxiety disorder was really struggling in school. My heart was breaking watching his distress. I wanted so badly for God to give me their health problems. But instead He asked me to trust Him. I just watched Hayden play lacrosse last night and Dylan, while he still is struggling in school, is not stressing out over it near as bad.

      We just have to KEEP reminding ourselves that “yes, God is in control, He made our sweet babies and He will provide what they need and what we need…we just have to believe that.”

      Thank you so much for sharing. I’m glad we are studying together!

    • Kim Golds says:

      Angela I can so relate. My boys are 14 and 12. It is a comfort to me that has posted angels (psalm 91) and he is with them wherever they go. ((((hugs)))

    • My fears right now as well! Praying for you all.

  12. Hey, how do y’all like the new comment option to be notified by email of your comment replies?

  13. Thank You Melissa –
    Facing Fear knowing that Our Father Loves Us and is Always there…is something we all struggle with – Now I am going to print out this little letter from Our Father – and put it on my mirror so I remember each day!!!
    Thanks – I needed that….!

    • Awesome Teresa! I think I will print it out too!

      Sheri Rose Shepherd is an amazing author. She was a guest on our “A Confident Heart” conference call series and all of her “His Princess” books are such a beautiful representation of God’s love for us.

  14. just found it so am subscribing now…thanks

  15. Holly Peck says:

    “So give up the fight” – wow, I guess that is what I have been doing – fighting to know the answers, solve the problems and “prevent” any hard times — all the while creating repetitive hard times! What a dichotomy!

  16. This study is blessing me by challenging me to go deeper in my faith and to stay “out of the boat”. I know there will be days when I will be “dunked” and swim back for “safety” … only to know that God is the only safety net I need. The visual of God taking my hand as I step out of the boat is so comforting and reassuring. It is scary … gives me a bit of anxiety thinking about it. But, I know NO MATTER WHAT God loves me and will not leave me…not even when I begin to drown in my own control!!!

  17. Kim Golds says:

    This study is an encouragement and a Great testimony that Fear can be conquered and that it is possible to live in peace when we surrender all to God!!

  18. Oh this is so good! I love that you used the word practice in your post…it was something the Lord put on my heart today as I did the questions for Chapter 2…practice. Amen!

  19. Thank you so much Melissa for todays prayer it was just what I needed to hear. To be reminded who is in control of all things big or small is a blessing to me. Isn’t it awesome how God works and gives us just what we need, just when we need it most. He is so faithful.

  20. Allison S. says:

    I love James 1:2-4 for its encouragement & challenge!! Count it ALL joy?!?! Really? my husband moving out, a divorce after 14 yrs of marriage and 3 kids, being a single mom, going back to work full-time after being a stay at home mom for 10 years – ALL of that?!? I couldn’t say it when I was first going through it, but now that God has carriend me through the past 5 years, YES! I count it all JOY for the way God used and continues to use it to “produce staedfastness” in me. I looked up the definition of steadfastness: fixed or unchanging, steady, firmly loyal or constant – None of those trials I listed above produced any of that for me – but GOD has!! And thank you God that although I felt broken and empty through all of that – YOU make me perfect & complete!!! YEA GOD!!!

    • Yea God!!!
      I am walking in the same path as you Allison – I was married 18yrs; he chose a 18 year old and drugs and moved on…I have been divorced 4.5 years and am the proud mom of 2 wonderful kids – And through it all God has been my portion. Granted it is not easy – but He’s Got our Backs!! Love Ya Girl – and will pray for you. Keep on Keeping on! Jeremiah 29:11 & PHil 4:13

  21. Oh Melissa, what a wonderful letter from my Daddy!I cannot even pick out a specific phrase, they all speak to my heart!! I want t be all I can be in and for the Lord. I do not want any part of fear holding me back!

    “Practice spending daily time in God’s Word. Make time for your Bible study. Don’t allow distractions or busyness to get in your way. And especially don’t let fear block you from moving forward. Fear be gone! We got places to go where you aren’t invited!: A wonderful practical reminder!!! LOVE IT!

    This has been a great week and I am loving every minute of the study! I have seen victories and I have been shown a couple of places where I have allowed fear to creep in.. fear of rejection…… I know I need to just remind myself that He is in control of my life.. If i take that test / put in that application… and the answer is no.. then He has a better plan!

    Thanks so much!

  22. Thank you, THANK YOU For your words today! I have been struggling so much the past two weeks and have been so overwhelmed with fear for my daughter. She will be changing schools next year, having to make new friends and entering a whole new world. I have been under this dark cloud of “What if” and have been trying to get a glimpse of her future for my peace of mind. Each time I am met with “Trust me Kendra; let me take care of it.” I find myself doubting my decisions, my abilities as Mom. I have felt like God dropped me off and just drove away. He hasn’t. He just needs me to remember truth, remember all of the times He has taken care of her, me, our whole family. I must go back to the markers in my life that show His care, His goodness, His love. The letter you provided today was the most perfect reminder for an insecure, heart-hurting moment I was having.

    • Sarah Rose says:

      Kendra…maybe you could even make a visual representation of those markers of when he has shown his care, goodness and love? Because, if you are anything like me, sometimes drawing them up in my mind, on my own, on a bad day is just too much. Have something right there where you can see it. Even the letter that Melissa posted in the blog…I know there was talk in previous comments of printing it out and posting it. I think those visuals can help bring us right back to where we need to be. Love and prayers, Sarah Rose

  23. Facing fear is definitely something I have not been excited about. But having a Bible Study, an awesome group with an amazing leader is making it a lot easier. I just read Lysa TerKeurst’s message “A Complete Waste of my Time”, and was able to relate the emotions mad and sad, but also included fear with them. I find that sometimes being fearful is a complete waste of time and energy. Relying on faith in God, His mercy and grace is all I need.

  24. Lori Ann says:

    After this week, I am certainly not “worry free” — my fears are all still very real, but I believe in time and with the practice that Melissa speaks of, I will get better at dealing with these issues that tend to disable me. You know, I was thinking just the other evening about how much time I spend in worrying and stressing about things that I really don’t even have control to change. All that time that I waste– maybe once I get this fear thing figured out, I can start a new hobby or something with the “free time” I will have! :) My heart gets excited at the thought of being untroubled. I am feeling expecially blessed today to be a part of such an amazing group of gals who are all willing to travel this road to healing together.

    • Sarah Rose says:

      “My heart gets excited at the thought of being untroubled.” I.LOVE.THIS!!!! Beautiful words Lori Ann!

  25. Melissa S. says:

    Thank you so much for your letter. I’m really glad that you wrote that it takes practice to get the fear/anxiety/worry under control. I have had depression on and off since I had my daughter (she’ll be 2 in May) and I was starting to feel better when boom, it just hit me again in February. February was a difficult month and now I have been having a daily struggle for several weeks. Mornings are the worst—I feel that Satan just waits for me to wake up to start filling my mind with my worst fears. I’ve been through this struggle before but never truly understood that it could be Satan doing this to me—that he brings up mistakes of my past to make me feel useless. Then I realized that God grants us undeserved grace and favor—He gives us chances to learn from our mistakes and move forward, not backwards. For too long I have allowed these thoughts to enter my mind and cripple me. I’ve noticed they seem to be loudest when I’m going through a difficult time and that’s when they do the most damage. I’m going to practice—-practice calling out to God. When I feel that Satan’s lies are entering my mind, I’m going to say, “Satan I reject you in Jesus’ name!” That came to me in prayer a couple weeks ago when I was talking to God. My hope is that if he hears it enough, he’ll let me be. God bless you Melissa and everyone participating in this study. Love and hugs to all.

    • Hi Melissa S.! I want to thank you for your words:
      “When I feel that Satan’s lies are entering my mind, I’m going to say, “Satan I reject you in Jesus’ name!” My hope is that if he hears it enough, he’ll let me be.”
      I am going to be saying the same thing to our enemy! I too, struggle with anxiety that was peaked by a pregnancy and it is a constant battle! I will be praying for you as you battle anxiety that is similar to mine. :)

  26. Melissa,

    I needed that today. I spent today catching up on the study and really spending time in this study. IT WAS SO SCARY! I can’t believe how tough it was to be so open and honest to God. And to myself. And the letter that you wrote…it was beautiful. I wrote one to myself this morning in my journal time that actually called myself a princess. Thank you for making a congratulatory note. I haven’t been giving everything up to the Lord. I still think I can do it all myself. I can’t. While I shouldn’t seek accolades of congrats and thanks…it feels good to know you are cheering us on. I am very scared…but perseverance and endurance and maturity come through trials! I am so new to walking with the Lord….it was comforting to know it won’t happen overnight. I was thinking that it was going to be instantaneous change..and was discouraged when it wasn’t. But, I’m more encouraged now after finishing the questions. Thanks for the opportunity to bask in His word. Looking forward to more, despite how scary it truly is. God Bless…

  27. Melissa, Thank you for this blog today. The letter is just what I needed. My biggest fear that I am dealing with is that I’m raising my two boys (ages 8 and 5) the right way and that I don’t let my fears and struggles rub off on them. They can be very trying at times (especially bad when I’m dealing with a migraine) and sometimes my temper will get the best of me and I explode. I am working on turning these struggles over to God. Thank you!

  28. Chapter 2 has been a real eye opener for me. Because of religion, for many years I looked at God as a big, gruff, burly man with a big stick just waiting to punish me everytime I did or said something wrong. It has only been in the past 8 years that I have come to know how God really is and that He loves me and forgives me. In my walk with God, fear has been one of my hardest batttles. It’s not because of God, it’s because the way I was taught and have felt for so long, but I know through this Bible study I will be able to face and deal with my fears with the help and love of God.

  29. Just wanted to share that after completing chapter 2 questions Tues evening, I was feeling hopeful and a bit more at ease, then Wed. morning my oldest son showed up and had missed work and I was thinking, “Please God, not now, not again”. I have been diligently praying for him for over a decade it seems. He is 33 with 3 children and not married at this time and he has a lot of built up anger and bitterness towards his biological father who has been absent in his life since the age of 12. He is always blaming others for his misfortune. Well, I must say God is so good. When he arrived yesterday morning, he said he wanted to go put in more applications for a better paying job (which is a blessing in itself, as we have been getting into our monthly finances to help him) and it has been very difficult on us. I decided I would drive him (his car is not always dependable) and we spent the day together. We talked, or should I say he talked a lot and said he was tired of being angry and he knows he needs to forgive and make some much needed changes in his life. He said, “Mom, I’m not sure why I don’t like myself and not sure that I ever have, but I realize through our many talks that I have got to learn to like myself or how are others going to like me”? I told him he needed to realize he is a child of God and GOd loves and forgives him and that his past is just that, it’s in the past and he needs to take one day at a time and move forward. I have had these talks with him more times than I can count and now by the grace of God, he is hearing me and wanting to make some changes….I know it will be a tough and slow process for him, but I will continue to pray for him and let God do the work. I know as a mom it won’t be easy for me as well, but I am putting my trust and faith in God. I thank you all for listening and I am asking that each of you would lift my son (Kris) up in prayer…..Right at this moment I am praising God for this breakthrough….Thank You Father for Your loving mercy and perfect timing…In Jesus name Amen…..

    • I also wanted to add that for the first time in a long time, my son and I had a great day with lots of talking, sharing and laughter….God is so good….

      • Hi Deborah! This is so amazing! I am so happy to hear that God is working in you and your son’s lives! I will pray for Kris as he continues to make changes in his life. :)

        • Deborah Creekmore says:

          Thank You so much. I was sitting at my computer this morning going throught the BS and was hoping someone would reply back to me as I am in such need of prayer and then “Praise God”, I saw this post and it meant so much to me. There are times I feel all alone in this battle with my son. My husband tries to comfort me and tells me he knows how I feel and what I am going through, but in reality, he has no clue. He is very laid back and non-confrontational and when it comes to things like this in our family, he chooses to ignore them in hopes it will go away. I don’t have a lot of friends (not because I am mean or anything, or unlikeable) because I am always so busy doing for my family and taking care of things around the house as my husband works offshore. I had to fight back the tears when I read your reply, but it was tears of joy, because you did take the time to reply and to know that you too will be praying for my son means the world to me. I heard this on one of my tv church programs last night….”Prayer should not be our last resort, but our first response”…I love that…it is so true. Again thank you and God Bless You always.
          Warmly, Deborah

  30. When my phone rang last night and my son told me that after 4 years of college he’s decided to join the Army, the first thing that came to my mind was…WoW did God put this bible study in my hands just when I need it most. I tried to get through the reading last night, but my mind just couldn’t focus so today I’ll try again. I know with all my heart that what I will find today will be just what I need to hear.

    • Sarah Rose says:

      Kim, I pray for you and your son. I pray that God will give you those exact words you are searching for.

  31. These first two chapters have been amazing. I have been fighting fear most of my life. I must admit that when I heard the words “Don’t sweat the small stuff”, I began to “sweat” the fact that I couldn’t even do such a simple thing. While I must admit that over the past year and a half, I have been able to finally lay down most of that small stuff as well as the larger items, I have been reminded this week that it it is a journey-a daily walk with God.

    I must admit that I thought I was “over” my old self. But, she is still there. The Devil is waiting for me to slip up. Recently, it has been in self-worth and having confidence in myself again. I try not to base each day on the items that could cause me to freak out-current financial situation, singe life at the age of 33, heart palpitations, distractions from my reading and God’s calling in my life. The devil even seems to wait for me in my dreams like Freddy Kreuger (Seriously, y’all!!) Evil Smutty devil! I rebuke you!

    These two chapters have reminded me of nightmarish situations BUT also of God’s grace and love during those times. I’m so grateful that I can share this journey with those of you who have FOUGHT your own fear and spoken up. You don’t know how many lives you might touch simply by being real! Thank you! And, thank you Melissa and Micca for putting on your armour.

    Thankfully, I now have a visual in my head of a great line of strong Women fighting for Jesus who is leading us against the Evil One. It may be silly but if Peter Jackson can do it in The Lord of the Rings then I can visualize the same for Our Lord Who is the Creator of the elements which made the metal for the ring :-) There is a spiritual warfare in our midst but I’m thankful for God’s armour (Ephesians 6 ) and all of my warrior women here on Earth!

  32. Thank you so much for your words today. This has been a really rough day for me. I have so many fears. 4 1/2 years ago I fell and broke my ankle really bad. I broke both bones in my leg and crushed the ankle joint. I’m not able to walk much because it didn’t heal right. I am so dependent on others at work to park my car and then go get it and I really hate being a bother to others. That is a constant fear not knowing if I will get to where I can’t walk at all. Three years ago my Mom got sick and only lived about 2 weeks after we took her to the hospital. We brought her home with Hospice. And three years ago today my Mom looked at me and very calmly and matter of factly said “I have to die”. I told her that was ok we would be fine without her. I knew she was going to a much better place. In Oct of last year my best friend died. I’ve had some problems handling the events that surround her death but I was doing pretty good. Then a friend at work who leads this little Bible Study told me that it was just her time to die and nothing could have change that. That God already has everything in your life set and nothing can change any of that. I was raised that you don’t question God. But I was also raised and firmly believed that pray could change things. I fear that I am so far off in my beliefs that I just don’t know any more. It is really hard for me to pray. I just keep thing way pray if it does nothing. I’m so afraid. I know that Satan is putting these doubts and fears in my head but I just can’t seem to get past them. I really need ya’lls prayers. This has just been such a hard time and today just seemed to top it off.

    • Jennifer Rasor says:

      Hi Linda,

      I want to encourage you that God’s Word very clearly tells us to “Pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17) and that where two or more are gathered in His name, He is there w/ them (Matthew 18:20). Jesus also prayed three times in the Garden that if it be God’s will, that He would take His suffering away so He wouldn’t have to be tortured and die. It must have been so hard for God to watch His Son die in agony on the cross and not to do anything to rescue Him even though He certainly had the power to do so. But He had a greater purpose and plan in mind. I firmly believe that God always hears and answers our prayers, but sometimes the answer is yes, sometimes it is no, and sometimes it is not yet. The Bible also says that God has set the places where we will live and that He knows the number of our days, so it’s true that He already knows when we’re going to die. But that does not mean we shouldn’t pray when a loved one is sick or dying. The answer may turn out to be no, but it may just be that it’s in God’s plans to keep that person alive longer because of the faithfulness of His followers in prayer. You are right, the enemy wants you and all of us to believe that prayer is pointless and that we shouldn’t bother. But prayer is so powerful, and necessary. And it brings people together, not to mention it brings us closer to our Heavenly Father. So don’t let Satan keep you from a closer relationship w/ God. And if someone in your life is hurting or dying, and you pray and God’s answer is no and that it is that person’s time to go Home, then share with God in complete honesty your sorrow, your doubts, your anger, your pain…whatever you are feeling. He will be right there with you and will help you to rise again. I would encourage you to go to Wendy Blight’s blog and read the post from yesterday where Heather Blier wrote a story about the orange grove. It was so encouraging. Here is the link: I will be praying for you!


      • Linda D says:

        Hi Jennifer,
        Thank you so much for your comments. I really do believe in prayer. My prayer life has suffered lately but I don’t give up. I love my Saviour so much. God is so awesome. I am working really hard on telling Him my feelings. Thank you so much for the encouragement.

  33. Once again Melissa…thank you for this bible study. Like some of the ladies have already of my fears right now is my marriage. I am not 100% sure that he has cheated on me…but throw in substance abuse and jail and let’s just say in my gut I think he has. He has been out since the end of January and for the first time I have hope that God can restore the marriage. Even so.. I am not in a good place right now- maybe over something petty but it will consume me for a while. What better time to give all my fears to God.

  34. Wow! Melissa, thanks for including the letter. I will definitely be printing that one out and reading and RE-reading it often!
    Ladies, I’m so touched by your challenges and honesty. Thank you all for being authetic before our God.

    This morning I struggled with the question on Chp 2 about how do we know if our fear is FEAR or justified. I’ve carried some of these silly fears for so long that I have a hard time distinguishing “real” from False. I know that God wants me to live in His victory and I’m trusting HIM to help me to let go of the hurt that others have caused. I only have control over ME!

    Keep on walking strong ladies!

  35. Well, Satan is at it again…I don’t understand why the fight for my children has to be so hard. After mine and my son’s day yesterday and the great talk we had, I was so excited and posted here to share the wonderful news and then this evening he shows up after work, with an unopened beer in his hand and a bad attitude. I of course said something about the beer, which made his attitude worse. I ended up asking him to leave. I know I handled this wrong and I guess I shouldn’t have said anything,but he has so much potential and drinking, even one beer for him makes matters worse and just breaks my heart. I am asking for prayer for my son and for myself. Everytime this happens, I get physically ill and the fear of him never changing gets worse. The sad part is I wasn’t even angry when I said something to him about it, but when he got angry with me for saying something to him, then I got upset and angry with him. This is breaking my heart. I don’t know any way to help him except to pray for him and most of the time I just keep my mouth shut. Prayers please….Thank You all for listening….

  36. Thank you soooo much for that wonderful post Melissa. This has beena amazing book so far. I have always struggled with WHERE WAS GOD while growing up with two alcoholics, being molested repeatedly my my neighbor, being raped and finally being bulimic and anorexic….So some things have already been revealed to me and im sure there is more to come! Thank You Everyone for sharing!

  37. This is such a great Bible Study and so needed. I have to say, I thought I the only one who worries the way I do, but I see that is not the case. Satan has been busy!!!! I pray for each and every one of us and look forward to hearing some amazing testimonies as this study progresses. Thank you Melissa!

  38. Wow – as I am reading chapter 2 (and I am only on page 29), I didn’t expect these strong emotions of regrets come up like that. I love my family but I’ve always felt that it was my family who is holding me back. I’ve given up so much in the past 16 years but also gained so much and been blessed so much BUT there was always that emptiness lingering within me and still sometimes is. I never knew why these feelings came up so strong in the past. Fear, regrets, resentments and all that other “great” stuff is so deep within me that I had no idea. Thank you Melissa for this beautiful letter. But my question to you is – is it normal for all that gunk to well up again when you try to actually get rid of it? I know that this year will be my big year of getting rid of all that nonsense that I have been carrying inside of me and I also know it takes time and I need to let go and heal but do I really need to first deal with it – like one by one? Just wondering because mine have emerged pretty strongly and sometimes I feel so overwhelmed that it makes me so sick to my stomach and gives me headaches and sleepless nights and just put me into this deep hole. Does anyone else feel that way, or is it something that I just have to go through?

    • Jennifer Rasor says:

      Hi Sonja,

      It is DEFINITELY normal for all of the gunk to well up again when you are trying to find healing from it. Unfortunately in order to find healing, we first have to go through all of the messy and painful stuff, to really get past it. So put on your armour and keep your eyes on Jesus. He will help you to walk on water as you trust in Him and go through whatever is necessary to be completely healed from your past. I will be praying for you!


  39. I read chapter 1 earlier in the week and was deeply encouraged, and listened to the teleconference Tuesday (which was such a blessing … thank you!). Today, I re-read chapter 1, along with chapter 2 for the first time. As I was reading through chapter 2, I remembered Melissa’s message in the teleconference about the armor of God in Ephesians 6, which just deepened in my spirit the importance of meditating on God’s Word, the sword of the Spirit, and the only offensive weapon mentioned. The past 2 mornings, I have prayed through Ephesians 6 and meditated on it. I visualized each piece of the armor (also shared by you, Melissa), and it was a powerful reminder of God’s presence all day long, especially when in situations that usually trigger social fears, worry, and other negative thinking. I shared this scripture passage with my college son, who is a deeply committed Christian, but is struggling with a class that’s “playing with my head”, in his words. I’ve spent much of tonight writing down scriptures on trust in God, praise, thanksgiving, and who I am in Christ. Instead of believing and falling prey to Satan’s lies, I want to counterattack with God’s truths! Thanks ,Melissa, for the encouragement on your blog and in the teleconference, which have both helped to reinforce the truths shared in the book!

  40. Hi Melissa and fellow OBS buddies,

    I am doing well. I had been struggling with anxiety for years but I thought I had it a bit under control until 3 weeks ago. I been having extreme anxiety and fear and panic attacks that kept me awake a night. I was really depressed over this. God put this bible study in my way because I needed help. While you read the father’s letter peace came over me like I hadn’t felt in a while. I admit I have a problem trusting the Lord because of the way I was raised. I grew up on the hard gospel where if you sin God will punish you and you were going to be left behind. So, I always feared the Lords wrath and I feared I was going to be left behind. Which if you ask me it is a pretty harsh way of teaching a kid about God and it kept me away for so long. However, now I know the Lord as my savior. Not only did he save me from sin but of depression. He brought me of of the sheol I was experiencing. It has been a long process but everything will be on His timing. I just have to accept that God isn’t a God that abandons or punishes but a God that’s forever faithful and mercyful. I need to put my trust in him.

    Thank you and God bless!

    • Lily…oh dear sister, I am so excited for you. Once you begin to internalize God’s truth that He loves you NO MATTER WHAT…well, I think you will find a lot of freedom from your anxiety. Anxiety can also often be rooted in anger…I wonder if there is any anger you might need to let yourself release…even if it is anger at yourself…sometimes forgiving ourselves is the hardest work!

      Love and Hugs!!! I can’t wiat ot hear how God works in your life! Stephanie

  41. Jennifer Rasor says:

    I am doing well so far this week, in terms of keeping up with this study. Despite not having the book yet I foud the intro & Ch. 1 online & was able to read those, two times. I’ve read the freebies that are on Micca’s site, Micca’s & Melissa’s blogs, took part in the conference call Tuesday which was a huge blessing, and answered the Ch.1 questions. (Can you tell I’m a checklist kind of person? 😉

    I am doing pretty well w/ facing and combating my fears considering I don’t have a full-time steady job anymore and am going through job hunting. On one hand I’m excited, hopeful & confident. On the other I’m scared I might not find a job in enough time and I will put not only myself, but my sister, mom & niece who I share a home w/, in jeopardy. And that is one of the easier fears to face…jobhunting. The harder ones are fears that I will repeat past mistakes or patterns in my life and/or relationships, that I’ll be alone/single forever, that I’ll never be blessed w/ children of my own (I’m 34 now and still unmarried & childless, and not getting any younger), that I’ll never be able to get out of debt or to finish my education degree when I am SO CLOSE to finishing. That I will never live worthy of the calling God has placed on my life and will misrepresent Christ instead of leading others to Him like I want, etc. I don’t dwell on these things constantly, and yet, they’re always there.

    On a positive note, I have 2 Tim. 1:7 memorized already…”For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.”
    AND, I received my “Untroubled Heart” book today so now I can read Chapter 2!! YAYYY! :)

  42. Brittany jacobson says:

    Hello Melissa taylor im doing great i actually fininshed the whole book because once i started reading it i could not put the book down. it was just what i needed God was speaking to me through that book the whole time. now i have to go through and answer the questions what an awsome study!

  43. I was so very, very busy today. I work for a radio station, and we have been up to our eyeballs in busyness because it is our gift drive time. I have experienced so much emotion today. It has been rough. I worry about our station’s goals even though I know it is in God’s hands. I also worry about how I am performing of course because when I am on air I have this weight on my shoulders just hoping and praying that people will call in and take part in our ministry. It has been rough. I have been rough on myself, and I am afraid that I will disappoint my management and listeners. I came home so emotionally drained and feeling sad. My heart feel broken right now. I know I am doing what I need to do, but I am afraid that maybe I am getting my signals crossed. Thank you for the prayer today. It is a help. Tonight I was going to work on the questions for chapter one, but my brain doesn’t seem to function. I guess I have a real fear of failure. :(

    • Brittany jacobson says:

      LOrd jesus i lift up kelley B i pray for blessing and favor at the radio station she works at give her open hands to recive her blessings lord. lord i pray that you would touch the listenrs hearts lord really tug at there hearts as they sleep tonight to donate to them lord. i pray for kelly lord i pray you feel her with peace and strength and courge and empty her of everything thats not of you amen

      • Brittany, I cannot thank you enough for your prayers. I’m sitting here crying now. Thank you for taking the time. It means so much more to me than you may ever realize. I pray that the Lord richly blesses you. Your prayer was a true balm for my soul.

        In Him,


        • Brittany jacobson says:

          your welcome kelly B i just felt a tug at my heart to pray for you
          tommrow is a new day
          look up this verse i dont know were it is but this is what i can actually see in my mind . his mercy are new each day
          have a great night kelly

  44. Thank you so much for this study! As one who has bad anxiety, I’m choosing faith! Bringing up alot of things from my past, fears for my children. But I know I can do this!!!

  45. Melissa, this is awesome. I never thought of it that way before but it’s so true, in order to become the best we can be through Jesus we need to practice at it just like anything else. It’s not automatic, until we spend time in the Word, at His Feet and serving Him. I am going to print this out and post it on the fridge as a reminder throughout the day.

  46. Deborah Carol says:

    this has been a eye opener for me going thru the question is helping me to see where I was and now where I am going!!!!

  47. God has conquered more fear in me this week than i thought possible!! and random little words of encouragement are coming from everywhere…to replace fear with faith and to know that God is in control. God is showing me things that i have been overlooking. it is such a blessing to see him working in me through this bible study! thank you so much for the opportunity!!!!!!!!!!

  48. Stephanie says:

    “God, you’ve got this” was the first thought I had today when I woke up! I was able to listen to the first conference call with Micca Campbell last night and I LOVED it! This is my first online bible study, my second bible study ever. I was a little nervous about the forum even though I’m an avid “facebooker” and recently completed my bachelor’s degree online, because many times the online forum is missing a “personal touch” so to speak. However, the conference call made this all so real and was so encouraging! I love the fact that we can read Micca’s book and also hear her speak about it. (From now on I too will be hearing her voice when I read the rest of the book! :) ) Her words have given me such encouragement that I’m sure God will lead me through my fears and be stronger in Him. I thank God for leading Micca to write this book because I know it will help me. I am so encouraged to hear the other ladies on the upcoming conference calls. It has been way to long since I’ve felt this encouraged and feel as if there is hope to conquer my fears.

  49. Olayinka Okunola says:

    God is forever faithful and just like Micca says…. we are created for faith not fear and it is when we realise this that we will be able to say I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me. In 2010, I did an HSG scan the the results was bad, it showed that my two tubes were blocked and then I have had to undergo a very painful flushing. I had cause to redo the test three days ago and all the while, I was just praying, speaking in tongues while lying there. The results are out today and it shows that both tubes are PATENT!!!! I am so relieved because it means that God is still in the business of working miracles, I don’t have to do that painful flushing again and I know that it is just a matter of time till I am pregnant again. I can’t stop smiling! God is such a good God…all the time. My sisters, remove fear and replace with faith, things will start turning around for the better!

  50. Deborah Creekmore says:

    1 John 4:18-19 says, “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love. We love Him because He first loved us.”
    Can someone help me with the part in the verse that says, “But he who fears has not been made perfect in love”…Does this mean because I have fear there is no love….thanks

    • Jennifer Rasor says:

      Hi Deborah,

      It certainly does not mean that if you have fear you have no love. What recently came to my mind when I read this verse, was that when someone really loves us, all our anxieties and fears dissipate because we are secure in their love. We feel so confident and safe knowing that we are really loved by someone, that our fears just dissolve. So when we are truly living in the perfect love of our Father in Heaven, then that love casts out fear. That doesn’t mean we will never have anxiety or fear again, but then when we reposition ourselves again and put our focus back on Him and in His love, I believe that our fears will again lessen until they are gone. Because we will be living in the safety of His love and will have no reason for fear. So when it says that “he who fears has not been made perfect in love”, I think it just means that they aren’t walking in the perfect love of Christ during that time. It doesn’t mean you don’t love the Lord, or that you’re not genuinely trying to follow Him. If we were perfect there would have been no reason for Christ to die on the cross in the first place. And remember too that there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ (Romans 8:1). The devil would like us to believe that this verse means that we have no love if we are afraid, or that we aren’t capable of love, thus feeling somehow condemned, but that is not God’s will. I think God wants us to be convicted to walk in His love and to trust Him just as a child trusts a parent and doesn’t fear for his or her safety when the parent is near. He just wants us to reverence Him as well as to trust in Him, and to confide in Him like we would a best friend and believe in His immense, unmovable, unconditional love for us. Praying for you!