When I wrote yesterday’s blog post, All are Welcome Here, I mentioned some of my fears and insecurities in joining a Bible study. I found out that I’m not alone. Many of us have fears and situations where we don’t feel comfortable, feel like we don’t fit in, or have to wear a mask to disguise who we are. My guest today, Jamy Whitaker is no different. Let me tell you about Jamy.
She’s one of us. Yes. Jamy began doing Online Bible Studies a little over a year ago. She struggles with the same things we struggle with. Like us, she wonders if God can use her with her flaws and insecurities. Yes, He can. Yes, He did.
Get REAL by Jamy Whitaker was released just last week! Get REAL examines how to take off the mask and be who God has created you to be without fear.
We are fortunate enough to have Jamy share with us today. I know you will enjoy this piece titled Book Covers. And I really know you will enjoy that you have a chance to win this book just by commenting on this blog post. Read to the end for details.
Book Covers
Have you ever thought of people as book covers? Let me explain. I have always loved books, even from a very early age. I can remember going into my closet and sitting on the floor and reading for hours. Reading can take you on adventures you would otherwise never go on. However, selecting a good book is not easy. When I was younger, my selections came primarily through the books on my shelf, that I had been given, or the school library. Although the library had several books, I still stuck pretty close to the authors I knew or ones recommended by the librarian. As I have grown, my love for books has increased. I absolutely love curling up with a good book, especially on a gloomy, rainy day.
I received a Kindle a couple of years ago. I honestly did not know whether I would really like it. However, I soon discovered that the Kindle opened up a vast number of books to me. The first time I went on the Amazon site, I was amazed by the sheer number of books. I almost did not know where to begin. I, of course, looked for my favorite authors and genres. However, there were so many free books that I thought maybe I should give some other authors a try. But how does one go about selecting a book? If it is not the author, what draws you to a particular book? Is it the title or illustration on the cover? I am certain that if we were all honest, most of us would have to admit that we make a judgment call on the book based on the cover. I do not know about you, but I heard countless times growing up, “You can’t judge a book by its cover.” I have certainly found that to be true.
The same principle can be applied to people. How many times, in a crowded room, are we drawn to the people who either look like us or simply look like they have it all together? The key word there is “look.” It is easy to make the outward appear acceptable to others. In other words, mask our real self. However, God looks at the heart, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7 NIV). God does not look at the outward appearance or even the mask people wear. He looks at what matters, the heart. Samuel, like most of us, got hung up on appearances. Society and the media thrust this idea upon the general public at an alarming rate. They are marketing a look and many people buy into this gimic and will do whatever it takes to fit into this mold. However, in the process, they lose sight of their true identity. God took the time to remind Samuel that inner qualities — our identity in Christ — mean far more than outward appearances
The word heart is mentioned over seven hundred times in the Bible. I am certain this indicates how important it is to God. God searches the heart and knows everything about us. We have a wonderful example in the person of David. He is said to “be a man after my [God’s] own heart” (Acts 13:22 NIV). Being a person after God’s own heart is exactly what each and every one of us should strive for. It is no coincidence that the heart is centrally located within the human body and is vital for so many functions — for life itself. Therefore, our concern needs to be getting the inward straightened out, so that it can be reflected to the world.
I speak from experience. Many things in our lives can be hidden from others by putting on a mask that so many of us wear. However, if we would just focus on our heart issues, then everything else in our lives would fall into place. In order to get to know someone, we have to go beyond the outward. We should not pre-judge people we come in contact with. You and I need to take the time and interest in the lives of the people around us. Getting to know a person will help us to determine whether we have things in common. To do that we need to go deeper, to the heart of the matter, if you will. You and I need to take the dust covers off of ourselves and let people see us for who we are. Then, they will feel more at ease and more likely to let their guard down and be comfortable enough to take off their own masks. It is imperative that we are all real with one another and, most importantly, with God.
It does not matter how we dress or if we have it all together. None of us is going to have it all together this side of heaven. If people wait until everything is just perfect in their lives to come to Christ, then they will miss out on salvation. So, as Christians, you and I need to take off the mask and share where we are and, even more importantly, where we have been and what Christ has done and is doing in our lives. By sharing where we have been, we are not glorifying our past, but instead we bring glory to Christ for what He has done in our lives. How many times have you felt more at ease talking with someone who has traveled down the same road? If we are hiding behind a mask, we never share our personal journey with others. By doing so, we are able to help others along the path.
Would you like to discover ways you can break free of that mask? I encourage you to check out my book, Get REAL: Stop Hiding Behind the Mask. It shows what our true identity in Christ really is and how we can take off the mask and let our true-self shine through.
For more information, please check out my website, www.jamywhitaker.com, or my facebooks page, www.facebook.com/AuthorJamyWhitaker. I would love to give away a copy of my book to one of Melissa’s readers. You will receive one entry for commenting on my post. You will earn additional entries for “liking” my author page on facebook and subscribing to my blog. I will announce the winner this Friday.
Blessings to all my Online Bible Study Sisters,
Jamy
Thanks Jamy! And thanks to all who are visiting with me today! Don’t forget to leave a comment so you can have a chance to win her book and take off your mask for once and for all!
For our Facebook users: We have 2 Facebook parties going on tomorrow! Hope you can join in for one or both of them!
Pastor Steven Furtick , Lysa TerKeurst, and I will be chatting and answering your questions about his new book and our next Online Bible Study after Unglued, >Greater. You can join the conversation live on Pastor Steven’s Facebook page. Wednesday at 1:30-2:30 pm EST.
The Online Bible Studies Team and I will be chatting and hosting a drop in for any who can attend our party too! We’d love to talk to you, answer any questions you have, and just get to know you better! If you can join us Wednesday, September 12th from 4-5 pm EST, we’d love for you to join us. RSVP here.
Please note: These are 2 different Facebook parties. The first on Pastor Furtick’s Facebook page at 1:30-2:30 pm. Then at our Online Bible Studies Facebook page at 4:00 pm. (Eastern Standard Time)
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wow youve done it again another great blog another great guest! this one hit my heart yes i have mask okay on one side the out side you see this prayer warrior and singer and bible reader , but on the inside I am broken you only see the good in me your only seeing the half of me. So very true you cant judge a book buy its cover many times ive done that judege people out of fear oh that person gonna hurt me cause of the way there dressed im just gonna role up my window and they turn out to be the sweetest people.
O this message is so on time!! Thank you for sharing! I don’t wear makeup but have definitely hidden behind a mask of sorts. I’ve just added this book title to my wish list!!
Yes I agree, “you cannot judge a book by its cover, and so it is with us because what you see externally is definitely not what goes on inside, there is just too many hurting , pain filled individuals – myself one of them that finds it easier just to put on a mask hoping no one can really ever see— But I like that God looks @ the ❤ Our AWESOME SAVIOR SAVES,
THANK YOU FOR SHARING! Our precious Father in heaven has been dealing with me on this very issue. It’s only when we let Jesus see and have ALL of us, that he can begin the healing process. It isn’t always comfortable but it DOES bring healing and freedom!!!
I love that I don’t have to wear a mask in the online studies. I am so blessed by others in the groups that share their hearts and woes and their “imperfect progress”. It is a safe place. How can we/I make the rest of the world a safe place? Even church is not always a safe place. There are people who judge us no matter where we go – now why do I make that a priority or really even care what a stranger or co-worker may think about me? But I know I do and that is the saddest part. When I was younger, even thru high school, I was more concerned in disappointing my parents than fitting in with the crowd at school. Why is it as an adult do I not worry more about pleasing my heavenly Father? You know I never really thought about it. But I always wonder what it is I am meant to do for God – and even though I truly believe I was called to pray – why do I feel I have to do more – more outward acts that others can see?
WOW – I can see I need help in this area. Now why was it you brought it up, Melissa? (I ask in jest).
Hi Jamy –
I like your analogy of the book cover and how we are often drawn to what seems comfortable, what may be similar to us or what looks put together when in public settings. I had not thought of “it” in those terms. I do like that God will take us as we are and with his love perfect into what we need to be, not what we think should be.
I feel like I have lived behind a mask almost my whole life. I would love to have the confidence and freedom to be myself when I am with others. The Lord is working on me though and he’s not finished with me yet! Praise God!
This speaks to something that happened to me yesterday – I don’t wear a “mask”..as many around us do – my feelings were deeply hurt when a person wearing a “mask” was ugly to me — I felt very sad and also very angry that this person wore a “nice looking mask” – but truly wasnt a nice person. People approach me and talk with me EVERYWHERE I go..perhaps because I don’t wear a mask…but it leaves me open and vulnerable to those who hide behind their mask and perhaps are even jealous of those of us who don’t have to wear one.
Thank you for letting us share
Wow, thank you for introducing us to Jamy. I do hide behind a mask. I think not so much because i may not be the perfect Christian because i know that can never be, but more because i think if people ever knew my real personality they would think me weird, judge me, be mean, or worse yet even reject me. So i hide the real me and try to fit in and put the real me behind the mask. I learned this from being hurt and judged in the past and mostly by fellow Christians. I need to “get over it”, “give it to God”, and get on with my life and the real me. This book is going on my wish list!!
Great blog post! I hope I win your book, but if not I will definitely put it on my “to buy” list for later!
I loved the message! I know that I tend to hide behind a mask and this spoke right to my heart. Thank you for sharing Jamy!!!
Like Jamy, I have loved books ever since I was little and I will admit that the #1 reason I buy a book is because of the illustration on the cover. Obviously, that’s not a coincidence! What spoke to me most about this post is how she said that it’s easier to open up to people who have been down the same path – so true!
Thank you Jamy so much for your blog! Your book is definitely on my ‘must read’ list! It’s time to be comfortable in my own skin and dare to be what God wants me to be!
Beautifyul post Jamy…. and thank you so much. You read my heart. Authenticity has been a stuggle for me for a long time. I am probably more authentic than I realize… but most of the time I do feel like I am wearing a mask. With everyone in my life, to some degree, even my husband. I don’t know if anyone knows the ‘real’ me.. heck, I don’t even know the ‘real’ me! I have been involved with Melissa’s bible studies for about a year as well. I think with them, I am the most authentic… but it is easier isn’t it? They can’t ‘see’ me and most will never meet me. It is easier to show your heart online than in person, I think…
I am starting classes for my masters in professional counseling… I so credit this awesome group of women for loving me and leading me back to the Lord and what, I feel, is my calling on this earth. It fits into exactly what you said. Sharing with others where I have been and what God has brought me through… And a ‘new’ set of people to learn… I am praying I can keep the mask off… I want others to see the real me… so they can see what God has done in me.
Kandace, good luck with your masters in counseling. It was the best thing I ever did for myself! I also feel it’s safer with most people to keep my mask on! One of my favorite poems is “We Wear the Mask” by Paul Lawrence Dunbar. These online bible studies have been a safe community and I’ve been blessed!
Thanks to Jamy & Melissa Get Real is the book for me, hope I win it. You are speaking right to my heart and I need to learn how God see’s me. It has been hard for me I was “In a race” all my life. It started trying to make others happy right from the get go, and I lost control of what makes me happy and never gave myself the time to get to know or like me. Life just rolled in and low and behold I suffered inside from it, I do so quietly. I guess with each event I put on the mask and smile at all things, where inside I am a mess. I even hide this from my kids, I think they see I am slipping. I thought it all had to be perfect. I became exhausted, bitter and even depressed. I was so busy pleasing others, and seeing that their needs were met. Now there are times I get too overwhelmed to leave my house, it’s almost like it is a chore. Funny thing is the person I was trying to impress over 20 years ago are no longer in my life and now I have the consequence of it all. Her kinds words as I left her life were it will go with you no matter where you go. That was encouragement, I thought at 18 I had to have it all together or look like it or what was wrong with me….Never thought of it as a process over time…. THis would be a good bible study! Thanks
Wow! The Lord has been dealing with me on this very issue. It has been a struggle to let others see ME completely as Jesus does with all my flaws and imperfections! But that is the only way healing and restoration can begin in our lives. Somedays don’t you just feel like an onion
Jamy,
First of all, I too am an early lover of books and reading. My husband gave me a Kindle Fire when it first came out and I was iffy if I would enjoy it because I loved the feeling of reading and holding a good book. But, once I got to know my kindle and searched the wide selection of literature I have been able to read triple of what I would normally read. IM SO IN LOVE WITH MY KINDLE!!!
In reference to your blog, WOW Jamy!! I felt that you were speaking right to me. For as long as I can remember I’ve always heard and said, “never judge a book by its cover”. I am one that on the outside I look like life is peachy, I have everything going well, things are in order, etc. When reality is on the inside im a chaotic mess. So many things are out of order in this season of my life, but because of fear of being hurt or taken advantage of its so hard for me to open up and let out what im holding in my heart. I am so looking forward to reading your book, maybe that could be help and or a tool for me to let go of that mask and be able to open up and let go of so much I bottle up inside. I need a breakthrough, this is even affecting my marriage. Thank you again Jamy for your insight and for using your God given talent to bless others.
Awesome post! First thing that the Lord put in my head was a song we taught our AWANA kids “the Lord doesnt look at the outward appearance. The Lird looks at the heart!” I needed to hear this today! Thank you!
What a great blog post!! I’m sure your book is definitely worth reading for myself as well as many others. We all have so many insecurities holding us back from so many things God has intended for us, yet we let those get in the way and hold us back.
Jesus Christ has done a beautiful healing and changing of my life in Him! I am so grateful that he sees me as I am and has work he has prepared in advance for me to do – good works only I can do. I go to Him 4 encouragement daily but sadness really fills my heart and lots and lots of anger at peolple who claim to follow Christ and do all manner of evil and distort and disobey Christ actually being workers of Satan. I just want to choose today to be honest with God about my great sadness and my anger at these people. I know that Satan is the one attacking me sooo hard and a that we fight not against flesh and blood but Satan’s Minions and Demons in the Spiritual World. I don’t know about being honest with people today – but I am going to choose to go to Christ and be honest with Him. Take off the veil by which I even try to hide how I really feel with him. He knew the true nature of people and did not entrust himself to them. He is my Prince of Peace. He is my confidant. He always speaks the truth to and about me. I don’t have to worry about Him ever, ever breaking my confidences. He understands each situation I face – He is all- knowing, all powerful. I don’t feel safe in church because, just because. I don’t have to explain myself. I hope there is someone out there who feels the same or might understand. But I can ALWAYS let my hair down with Jesus and He alone really understands. I would encourage others reading to do the same. He gives me all I need! He is the only one who can judge accurately and tell us how to judge situations and people in our lives. He sees all!
Thanks Jamy! I just had a conversation about this with my husband. Putting on the mask doesn’t help anyone. We have all had a life…good, bad and ugly….for a reason. If we keep it inside, hidden, we can’t help others who will identify with our story. Our story is our testimony, and it isn’t for us, it is to touch, help, someone else to the glory of God! Hard to go there, but God took us through a life for His purpose…
I look forward to reading your book! Honestly the “mask” is so exhausting to maintain. I’m ready to take it off…
You know I need to stop looking for the burning bush:) The LORD speaks loud and clear to me daily and I am always praying to hear Him. This is a book that is going to go into my library. Can’t wait.
Thanks for heart and openness
Another book to add to my must get list. It describes me perfectly!
Thank you both for sharing yourselves and for what you to for us women! It is so easy to hide away (like in the house, reading a good book lol) or to hide behind our masks and keep people at a distance. I am really good at it. I love reading the blogs and I can’t wait for the Unglued Bible Study and now I have another book to read! Thanks again!
So excited to see this sharing on the book – Get Reall… !!! Would definitely LOVE to win copy, sounds very helpful in overcoming the facades ppl wear; wishing more would relax – including myself – & just be real with each other!
I have liked your author FB page!
And subscribing to your blog!
Oh, and I thought I was going to just read a plain ole every day blog, nope!!! Thank you for starting out with the reassurance that all of us who feel alone in our insecurities are absolutely not. Then a major thanks for another book recommendation that is sure to work on my (hopefully) ever evolving heart! This is going to be a great journey. Thank you for yor bravery.
Wow It;s so great to read the story about Jamy. I too need learn to take off my mask and i can’t wait to read your book. Its a shame how were are so quick to judge a book by its cover and how we need to stop doing this with people. Great job Jamy and congratulations on you book!
You hit the nail on the head for me with this post. One thing that always comes up when I try to invite people to church with me is how some people view christians as hypocrites. I always try to impress upon them that I/we are no different then those outside the church. We ALL sin and fall short of the glory of God. It is only by his grace that I can function day by day. Thank you for this reminder to peek out from behind the mask and be your true self that God created.
Another book with my name on it. Insecurity is my middle name. =( Can’t wait to check it out!!!
Get ready to change that middle name!! You are victorious in Jesus!
Jamy’s new book looks awesome! I can’t wait to read it.
A mask – insecurities – yep I have had them and I think we all do and sometimes we just need someone to share with, someone who will listen and tell us it is ok or it is not ok and give us advise or a different perspective we haven’t thought about. I have felt that rejection at times growing up and even in adulthood – at school, at church, at work and at home (am I a good mother, am I a good wife)and sometimes (probably most of the time) it’s my own insecurities causing that rejection. There have been times in my life where I kept that mask on! During one season in my life I so needed to share and did with my best friend confidentially and wow you know what happened so I (you) hold on to that and never let go again and when you need a friend you feel you can’t trust anyone. For someone who grew up trusting and never disclosing a trust, that hurt! I love these studies where we have friends, we can talk confidentally and not be exposed and fall more in love with Jesus. I have LOTS of friends, even girls I went to high-school with and worked with for 30 years and I remember asking God to just send me a very close friend that I could feel I could share ANYTHING – not there was anything to share but sometimes you just need to talk! I believe He decided against that and I have found now I do have a friend – first God and second I have learned to share it all (most of it) with my husband who is so wise in offering different perspectives or my daughter who is always, always my cheerleader and now even my precious daughter-in-law who is such a sweetie. What relationships that has built up – the trust, the love, and respect because you know each other better. And I believe God led me to this point to be with other ladies not for me to share so much but to listen to others and encourage them. WOW thank God I can be a friend to those who have on their masks, who need an encouraging word, who need a prayer, who need a cheerleader, who need a FRIEND! So goodbye insecurities – well who am I kidding – sometimes but God is working on me each day molding me and fixing all those ugly insecurities!!!!! Thank you Jamy and Melissa for reminding us we have all been in this boat at one time or another but thankfully we have people like you two that devote your lives to encouraging us all to be the better us!
Have you been reading my mail, Debbie? Perhaps I should ask if you have been reading my sporadic journal entries? How I relate to your journey. Thanks.
Just beautiful to be here today and get confirmation. I wrote about pretending today – it’s time to get real. Take off the masks and spend more time being who God created me to be. Thank you!
This is such a timely subject for me. Thanks so much for all the encouraging info you bring to us.
Wow Get Real!… The words behind the mask hit home with me…All I could do was just look at the cover.. I felt as is someone could see my pain and I haven’t even read a word. In my life time I can’t count the times I have felt like I have lived my complete life behind a mask never really truly being able to be who I really am or sharing my true complete feelings without fear of disappointing someone. Hope to be able to read this someday.
As I read read this St, I am reminded of one of the poems I used in my English III classes. It was written by Paul Laurence Dunbar(1872-1906), a great Black poet trapped in an age with no adequate outlet for his talent. It begins, “We wear the mask that grins and lies,/It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes,–/This debt we pay to human guile;/With torn and bleeding hearts we smile,/And mouth with myriad subtleties.” What a struggle can war in our souls as we desire to be authentic, yet fear rejection and disapproval if people really knew who we were. Our only hope is to take off our masks and allow God to mold us into the unique individuals God created us to be. “Lord, give me the courage to leave the unique fingerprints and footprints that You desire. And may these prints reflect You, the God who made and loves me. I must decrease and You must increase.”
I can totally relate to what you wrote!
I would love a chance to win this book for free!
Jamy, wish I had been brave enough to give up my mask when I was younger. i think Christians especially have a problem with this, since we feel our testimony will be stronger if we show no or little weakness. The book sounds great!
There are very few people in my life where I can take off the mask and they are the closest and dearest people I have in life. I think I don’t take off the mask with anyone in daily life because I’ve been hurt too many times but not only am I not getting hurt by them….I am also not reaping any benefits I could have by knowing them, nor are they reaping any benefit in knowing me. It’s a catch 22, isn’t it? I hope someday I can stop wearing the mask but it’s so hard when people do judge by the cover.
This blog really “got to the heart of me.” Haha…but seriously, this is something I have been struggling with for a long time. I strayed off the narrow road a long time ago, and that may have been because I was so afraid and worried of showing people the true me inside. I was more concerned with people not liking me as a person if I ended up showing the “religious” side of me, so I fashioned a mask and became a person that I am not for a long time. Something hit me recently though, and I am slowly trying to take off the mask and come back to the person I was. It’s a struggle, but God is helping me through it. He has already opened my eyes to quite a few things in my life that need dealt with, and I pray He continues to do so. Thank you for the post; I’m glad I’m not the only one struggling with this.
exactly what the Lord has been speaking to me about these last few weeks… I am SO ready to be free of the mask!
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