Oct 29

A Message from Lysa TerKeurst

Trying to decide if our next Online Bible Study is for you? Lysa TerKeurst tells you why it is.
(If you cannot see the video below, click here.)

Sign up for the Greater Online Bible Study in the top right of my blog.

Order Greater from Proverbs 31 Ministries! You can purchase your book here. When you purchase resources through Proverbs 31 Ministries, you touch eternity because your purchase supports the many areas of hope-giving ministry we provide at no cost. We wish we could, but we simply can’t compete with prices offered by huge online warehouses. Therefore, we are extremely grateful for each and every purchase you make with us. Thank you!

If you haven’t already, get signed up for our next OBS!

And now, here’s the assignment for our Unglued participants today:

Answer the 3 Sabbath Questions from p. 156-162 (paperback).

1. Where am I going my own way right now?

2. What one area of my life is more self-pleasing than God-pleasing?

3. What idle words need to be reined in from running rampant in my mind or spilling from my lips?

Share with us in the comment section of today’s blog :)

***And please let me know if you purchase Greater through Proverbs 31. I’ve loved studying Unglued with you and I’d love to keep on going with Greater!



  1. At my age (62) I have seen many changes in how we observe the sabbath.When I was a child everything closed on Sunday.Many people went to church,although where I went you knew you had to be dressed up and no less was expected of you.Now people are less formal and I feel much more relaxed attending church on Sunday.The world had changed and people are much busier.Prior to Unglued I had slipped in my church attendance.I have gotten back to going and haven’t missed a Sunday.THANK YOU AND GOD BLESS!!!!!LYSA I WISH I COULD TELL YOU PERSONALLY HOW MUCH UNGLUED HAS HELPED ME

  2. Lynn Graham says:

    ( 3 ) Sabbath questions to answer.

    1) God’s way
    2) complaining when things are not going right
    3) words idle in perception

    Wednesday’s Question to answer:

    1) because it brings us to God.

  3. Barbara Prince says:

    1. Where am I going my own way right now?
    Let’s face it, God will not settle for second place. So, in light of that fact, I have to admit that my life is going my way most of the time. Let me tell you that I can tell that is so. The Bible promises us that you reap what you sow. I’m not going to find a consistence of the godly things I want to see in my life by going my own way. Peace is rare, unless I’m alone, like now. I struggle to find real quiet time and when I find it; my mind goes other ways-my ways.

    2. What one area of my life is more self-pleasing than God-pleasing?
    After reading the first question, that puts this question in a different light. I think it is my time. I crave my own way it my time. There are so many pulls on my time that I want to control that, sometimes even if that excludes God. Sometimes I just want to be left alone. Other time I want to have fun with my family with no outside pulls. But, you notice, it’s all about what “I” want. The big “I” always gets in the way of me making progress. “I” is a monster who must be trained in godly ways.

    3. What idle words need to be reined in from running rampant in my mind or spilling from my lips?
    Isaiah 58: 13 states,
    13 “If you keep your feet from breaking the Sabbath(A)
    and from doing as you please on my holy day,
    if you call the Sabbath a delight(B)
    and the LORD’s holy day honorable,
    and if you honor it by not going your own way
    and not doing as you please or speaking idle words

    Lysa said on page 16o “We get into trouble when instead of parking our minds on truth, we let them idle in perceptions.”

    So what does that look like, I wondered. Perceptions mean our own impression, observation, image in the mind, cognition, intuition, philosophy, or theory. Perception is what is in my human mind. Perceptions are all those things going round and round in my mind. All those things that I think are more important than sitting quietly in the Presence of the God of all Creation.
    Can I give God some time to do nothing while I just love on Him and allow Him to love on me?
    I am to “Love the Lord my God with all my heart and soul and might.”
    How much better my life would be it I just followed that simple command to Sabbath.

    • Catherine OBS Group Leader says:


      What great insight. Very honest and clear.
      I think a lot in your answers would apply to me. One area at a time so I don’t get overwhelmed as I’m apt to do. Imperfect progress.


  4. 1. Where am I going my own way right now?
    I am going my own way by worrying. God commands us not to worry. It’s not a suggestion, but a command. By worrying, I’m fooling myself into thinking that I have control over my circumstances and somehow by worrying, I can convince God that my way of fixing things is the better way.

    2. What area of my life is more self pleasing than God pleasing?
    My negative attitude towards those individuals who cause me pain makes me feel better. It makes me feel better to complain about all that they are doing wrong.

    3. What idle words need to be reined in from running rampant in my mind or spilling from my heart?
    I tend to let negative chatter about what I presume others are thinking or going to say. I do this to prepare for my comeback. I need to focus on the pure, the lovely, and the truthful, and to remember that out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks. I want a kind heart reflected by kind words, not a bitter, hard heart reflected by hurtful, bitter words.

  5. Jennifer N (OBS group leader) says:

    1.) Where am I going my own way right now?
    I see it in a lot of different ways. Mainly worrying over so many things. We are in a strange situation with my husband’s job–temporarily relocating (almost 2 years now) and they keep changing the dates–at the last minute–and so, we stay longer. Possibly permanently, but of course, that is last minute as well. Guess I am learning patience here.

    2.) What one area of my life is more self-pleasing than God-pleasing?
    Perhaps my ‘busyness’. I feel a constant need to ‘go go’, and after reading about Sabbath rest, I am thinking I need to ‘rest rest’ a little more. A lot of it is ‘busyness for the Lord’, but–I need to take time out and rest IN the Lord, too.

    3.)What idle words need to be reined in from running rampant in my mind or spilling from my heart?
    Negative, self-defeating thoughts. My son always says I defeat myself before the battle even begins. That I am stronger than I think. Yet, I spend more time on the inabilities that I have vs. the gifts and talents God gifted me with. And the fact that He is with me and in me to make sure those works He prepared for me to do, are accomplished. I am not on my own here. (unless, see #2 wink.)

  6. Terry Webb says:

    I bought the Greater book from Proverbs 31 and have thoroughly enjoyed and been strengthened by Unglued. Thank you for your dedication to us many needy women, you are a true witness to our Lord.

    • Catherine OBS Group Leader says:


      We’re glad you’ll be doing Greater with us. And so blessed you enjoyed Unglued.


  7. Going my own way, basically control issues, yes I have them.

    Love the new song off of Mercy Me’s Hurt and Healing Album:

    You’d think I’d know by now
    Who’s running the show
    And what really matters.
    But I keep picking a fight.
    With “letting go”
    And keep getting hammered

    It’s a knock down.
    Drag out.
    Oh and I am face down.
    For the count.
    And I’m reminded.
    I’m not the one in control.

    I know You know better so
    Why don’t I go whenever
    You say come follow wherever You lead.
    So won’t You help me

    Would You wake me up
    And make me aware
    Of what You are doing.
    And from my point of view
    It’s not very clear
    Where this is going

    But it’s Your call.
    Help me understand.
    It’s not how I fall.
    But where I land.
    So I’m reminded
    I’m not the one in control.

    I know You know better so
    Why don’t I go whenever
    You say come follow wherever You lead.
    So won’t You help me

    Whatever You have in store.
    Whatever I am in for.
    I want to trust You more and more and more…

    Oh oh oh oh, You know better
    Oh oh oh oh, You know better

    And I know You know better so
    Why don’t I go whenever
    You say come follow wherever You lead.
    (I know You know better so)
    I know You know better so
    Why don’t I go whenever
    You say come follow wherever You lead.
    So won’t You help me
    I know You know better
    I know You know better…

    This is me, but I am making imperfect progress. Taking all the nuggets of wisdom and placing them where I can us them! Blessings to all!


  8. #1. Where I have been going my own way is saying yes to requests or volunteering my time & energy to things BEFORE I pray about it.
    Still working on 2.
    #3. The idle words I need to work on reining in are nagging my husband and adult son. They mainly take in information via audio & I KNOW it really grates on their nerves to hear too many words…especially repeating over & over/nagging. I haven’t ever figured out how to be “heard” & but I need to put a cork in it! 😉

    • Catherine OBS Group Leader says:


      Try making a tape of what you want/need from them and playing it for them.

      Might just work.


  9. 1. Worring about situations I have no control of & how others feel or think about me. Not having such high expecations on people that don’t have any expectations of themself & then getting hurt by them.

    2. I totally enjoy my “ME” time. Being a single person I have plenty of “ME” time & I need to start using it in a positive way & turning things over to GOD to worry about & stop thinking that I am not good enough.

    3. Negative, self defeating thoughs & stop reading more things into situations in my relationships that are not there. Just have more confidence in a lot of areas of my life.

    • Catherine OBS Group Leader says:


      Sounds like you’re a lot like me…time to turn things over to God.


    • I have many things to worry about, I mean real issues some of which are life/death so it doesn’t help when someone chastises me not to worry, but what helps me the most with worry (& believe me when I say worry & fear are constant battles for me! 😉 is using the worry to prompt me to pray about the situation. I start worry & then it’s like, “oh yeah,! that’s my cue to turn my worry into a prayer.” Hope that helps you.

  10. Charolette Ragsdale says:

    Answer the 3 Sabbath Questions from p. 156-162 (paperback).
    1. Where am I going my own way right now? Let me start off by saying that I have learned some very valuable lessons in life as I have gotten older that you are always better off going God’s way than my way. It seems I face a lot more hurt and disappointment in life when I do things my way all the time and forget to ask God for his spiritual guidance and wisdom. There is a famous Bible verse that says we always reap what we sow and I humbly believe that based on my past life experiences. It is a hard lesson but one we must all come to face and accept as we develop a closer relationship with God in our life. My two biggest enemies in life with dealing with daily struggles seems to be worry and not enough patience. God always tells us there is no need to worry or be scared if we have faith in Him. Also, I tend to let me patience get the best of me when I am in a hurry to achieve my goal or want a quick end result. I have learned to pray more and wait for Him to give me an answer so I can honor God and continue to let Him guide me in my life since He has already set out a plan for me. If we seek God in everything we do, there is no reason to worry or be impatient about anything. So, now I am learning to live my life God’s way through imperfect progress. Galatians 5:22-23

    2. What one area of my life is more self-pleasing than God-pleasing? I have been known to overextend myself in my career since I always want to excel in everything I do and achieve as much as possible. But, I have realized it just makes me more tired and remember that I do not have as much time with God as I would like since I am always focused on doing more and more. I was brought up that success is everything in life so I was inspired to always be the “best” me. I need to remember that time with God is more important since He is the reason why I was created and given a purpose in life. On Sunday, I need to remember to rest more so that I can allow myself to have more peace in life. There is nothing like a little rest to rejuvenate the soul. Psalm 19:14

    3. What idle words need to be reined in from running rampant in my mind or spilling from my lips? I can turn negative thoughts into positive thoughts if I change my perceptions in life. Also, I want to always see the good in everything…including those situations that are viewed as bad. Everything always turns out good for God’s glory. It all comes down to glorifying our God because He loves us unconditionally. There are times I give up too easily and need to learn not to quit when things get too tough or do not seem to be going the way I expected them to go. I start to say “I can’t” instead of “I can.” I have learned those idle words get the best of you when you live a pessimistic life filled with insecurity or fear. So, I choose to start being optimistic by using words such as “I can,” “I will,” etc. so I can live a life filled with more grace. In the end, I know I will live a much joyful life rather than wallow in my self-pity. God does not want this kind of life for any of His children. Isaiah 58:13

    • Catherine OBS Group Leader says:


      What awesome insight and thought you have put into answering these questions.
      Thank you.


  11. I have been reading and following the Unglued Bible Study. I have not participated much in the study as I would have liked and have done in the past. Chapter 10 was really needed in my life today. You see, I was recently diagnosed with breast cancer and I have been muddling through life to get by. I am having surgery tomorrow and would like prayers for myself and family. It is a lot for all of us. I must say… Lysa makes me smile and laugh. She is so real.

    • Just wanted to let you know I just prayed for you. Good luck tomorrow and God bless.

    • Lord, We come before the Throne of Grace and Mercy, and know that we can, with utmost confidence, lift up our sweet sister Roseanne, and her family as she faces this surgery. Lord, give them all peace, and a strength that comes from YOU and you alone Lord God, we know that you love her SOOOOO very much!
      Prov. 14:30 says a heart at peace gives life to the body; We thank you for that peace for Roseanne now.
      2 Corinthians 4:16 tells us to not loose heart. and that we are being renewed day by day. Renew Roseanne’s mind, and heart Lord, to seek after YOU, for your comfort and direction. Holy Spirit annoint her, bathe her in your sweetness and love, and let that just radiate through her to everyone she meets.
      Though we know we have trials, you test our Faith; we have great examples of faith in Hebrews 11, and I pray that Roseanne and her family are encouraged by that, and that their faith in YOU will grow, moment by moment and ever increasing!!!!! You are refining her faith, and I thank you Lord that you are just so wonderful to reveal yourself to her as she comes to you with childlike faith.
      (1 Peter 1:6-7)
      With you Lord all things are possible (Luke 18:27). So we come before you and expect as the woman did with the issue of blood, (Luke 8:40-47)
      she bravely and with faith got to Jesus to touch the hem of his garment, knowing she could be healed, as she went to Him. We pray that Roseanne will as well stand in faith believing for a miracle – to be healed – in Jesus name!
      Roseanne, Jesus is your strength and portion! (Ps. 73:26); though you are pressed on every side, is power is within you (2 Cor. 4:7-9)
      He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge, his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart (Ps. 91:4)

      We praise you for the answer Lord, as we stand together believing with Roseanne for your Holy Touch in her body mind and life!!!! AMEN!

    • Joan Raffety says:

      Hi Rosanne:
      Just wanted to let you know that my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family!

  12. Carrie Carlsen says:

    I always write my own thoughts and then read the thoughts written. Thank you for sharing..everyone’s thoughts get me thinking about my life. I really love being challenged in God’s word.
    1) Right now, I feel God’s pull on my life. I am working hard to seek his guidance in all I do. I am looking to his word and trying to apply it to my life. I really think really taking the time to reflect on God’s word through a true Sabbath day would be amazing.
    2) I am not sure on the answer to this right now. I think that I need to work on seeing the good more in situations and people. I find that sometimes my attitude is a negative. I used to keep a gratitude journal and I loved ending my day reflecting on the things I was grateful for that day. I think this is something I should start again to keep my eyes open for the good!!
    3) Am I good enough? Those words have been coming to mind a lot lately for me. I have found a wonderful new church and I have made some amazing connections with people that in my mind are really walking the christian walk and I wonder if I am good enough to friends with them as I feel guilty that I am not doing more, but I am also not sure what I should be doing. I think that some prayer an meditation on the Sabbath would help me find the answers I am looking for. Also I wonder if I am a good enough Mom as watch other Moms and think wow there child is pretty good and my guys is good sometimes. Am I a good enough wife? As my husband travels, I feel so much pressure to be perfect for the little time he is home with good meals, good mood, clean house, etc. Thankfully, Unglued has given guidance to help with all these thoughts and I am so happy to have some, but right now I am making imperfect progress on reining them in and parking my mind on the TRUTH. I look forward to some prayerful time to let these thoughts go and put myself in God’s flow.

    • Catherine OBS Group Leader says:


      My heart sings that Unglued has helped you turn off some of your negative thinking. I’m happy you are finding who you are in Christ and how much you mean to us and to God. You will be truly blessed as you finish Unglued. Lysa has some more amazing truths to share.


  13. 1. Where am I going my own way right now?
    well, this is tough b/c I have to say nowhere; I have been about as emptied out as a person can be the past few years; Lost my home, no job, 15 yrs ago my husband died;(though God has given me some incredible insight at starting up a business/ministry – but that was after e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. else failed; the few job leads I had were nominally over min. wage – not even remotely enough to live on. People have forsaken and walked away b/c I have “nothing”, family and Christian family as well). That has been heartwrenching. But again, God is showing me, I am learning more than ever now, that leaning on HIM and his everlasting arms IS what I have to totally 100 % to rely on; which tells me not to lean on MY understanding, but lean on him in and through every single aspect of my life. I am a ducks in a row kinda girl. I ahvebeen looking forward to this time in my life for years, my kids are adults, and I had dreams of being in full time ministry, helping women, (which I was blessed at God’s leaning in one of my training “jobs” to work with homeless women for two yrs; the agency is now closed due to lack of funds :-( – which is sad)
    Question 2 and 3 go together with this situational circumstance, that I have been placed here and now, to only listen to him.
    In this “silent” time, I know the difference between his proding me and “my will” more than I ever have before. He leads me and guides me – I have days that I struggle wanting the “answer”, and I know the door will be opened very soon…
    Just so loving my Daddy, knowing he is a BIG God, with BIG answers, and I am in training, all the days of my life! :-)

  14. It is hard to answer these without writing a book, so I will try to be brief and still be clear. :)

    1. Not going my own way has been a huge part of what I have been working on over the past six months or so, and I would say I have made some imperfect progress. Yay!!! I would say the biggest area I struggle with going my own way is around the home. I slip into the “my way or the highway” mode much too frequently and I often lose my temper because things are not going the way I had planned.

    2. The area of my life that is more self-pleasing than God-pleasing is my down time in the evening. I really need to get back to those things that work towards renewal, rather than sitting for hours on the internet, just looking.

    3. This is another big area of improvement for me, but I still struggle with my perceptions of others vs. the truth in me. I judge my life from the perspective of what I see from the outside. This is a huge trap for me because I stop focusing on what God wants me to do and instead focus on the things I see that are “good” in others.

    Thanks for all of your hard work! I ordered Greater a while ago and have read a good portion of it already and look forward to discussing it. It is a wonderful message that will be an amazing follow up to Unglued.

  15. #1 I can talk a good game, but when it comes right down to it, I try to accomplish everything under my own steam and then give God the glory if I’m successful (as an afterthought). If I’m not successful it’s a good spiritual confession.
    #2 When I’m able to come up with a zinger in public that makes me seem intelligent, noble, spiritual – whatever. It’s pride.
    #3 A quick sarcastic cut down or slur against someone or something that came across as unfriendly or stupid or just unlikeable. (They’re an easy mark). I need to focus more on finding the good in others!

  16. Karri(OBS Leader) says:

    1. Where am I going my own way right now?
    *There is one thing in particular that I am “going my own way with” but I am too embarrassed(sp?) to say it :( When it comes to this certain thing in my life, I think I control it & I think I am hiding it from God but knowing he see’s everything I do..I feel so ashamed and I think if I ignore my sin it’ll go away……….

    2. What one area of my life is more self-pleasing than God-pleasing?
    *I could name more than one…..but the main one is my selfish tendencies(sp?)

    3. What idle words need to be reined in from running rampant in my mind or spilling from my lips?
    *Hmmm……..thinking (and talking) about certain people that I know and their bad habits when I have my own…..

    **These were tough questions for me and I am happy with myself for actually sharing! I really can feel God working in my mind and heart!**

  17. Joan Raffety says:

    1. Where am I going my own way right now?
    I think that would have to be worry and the fact that I need to relinquish control of my life and circumstances to God. I’m a master “fixer.” If anyone has a problem in my presence, I almost can’t keep myself from trying to solve it for them. Yes, I have a problem with control!
    2. What one area of my life is more self-pleasing than God-pleasing?
    I definitely over-extend myself. I need to work on finding a top three things and focus on those things and do them well instead of spreading myself all over the place and doing things halfway.
    3. What idle words need to be reined in from running rampant in my mind or spilling from my lips?
    I need to work on my negativity about my job and get some perspective about how lucky I am to have the job situation that I do. I also need to work on speaking and thinking negatively about myself.

  18. Lauren Beach (OBS Small Group Leader) says:

    1. leading myself to be over-whelmed and stressed, which is No-where
    2. Truly None, Nothing I do can be more self -pleasing than God-pleasing. God-pleasing is forever, self-pleasing is only for a little while (really need to remember this one)
    3. Negativity at work, jealousy and thoughts of I am not good enough ( I am only human as well)

    I really love pg. 154 ” It’s all about pausing. It’s all about connecting with God without the distracting rhythms of our everyday.” and pg.153 “We must also exhale – letting it all out before God and establishing a healthier rhythm by which to live.”
    Meaning I can change my answers to be more positive ones in the future if I let it all out to God and really connect with him without allowing distractions-yes like Facebook :( Imperfect progress–this book has been such an eye opener, I just love it and needed it!

  19. Bethsportsmomma (OBS leader) says:

    Oh my gracious, question #2 steps all over my toes! I need some steel toe boots before I tackle this one! My self-pleasing instead of God-pleasing area is time management (or the lack of)! I have spent years praying about this. Asking God to help me to be a better steward of my time. Seems like it hasn’t helped much. But you know why? Because I remain in the “self pleasing” frame of mind! I feel the “holy ghost nudges” telling me to get off Facebook or to put down my iPaf but I don’t listen to them! I know that I know that I know- that God wants me, no requires me, to be a good steward of my time! I can say that I’m doing much better and thank goodness I now know that it’s all Imperfect Progress, as long as I’m making progress! My prayer is to not let idleness be my idol!

  20. esp #3 resonanted with me – – idle words needing to be reined in from running rampant in my mind and out of my lips
    critical thoughts and words, negativity, complaining –
    this book has really opened my eyes – like someone else said above -0 I also have hidden from certain sins out of shame – but this book has helped me realize it is okay to make IMPERFECT progress – and just keep going and that I’m not the only one
    thank you !

  21. Christy Q says:

    Answer the 3 Sabbath Questions from p. 156-162 (paperback).
    1. Where am I going my own way right now? Not having patience for God to reveal the next step in his plan for me.
    2. What one area of my life is more self-pleasing than God-pleasing? Trying to figure out my next step, what direction to turn and not resting in him.
    3. What idle words need to be reined in from running rampant in my mind or spilling from my lips? Frustration, impatience and intolerance of the current situation I am in.

    I can say that I most definetly have control issues. Its very hard for me to wait…

  22. Although it’s November 4th, I am finishing up my imperfect OBS work slowly but steadily.
    Where am I going my own way right now? I can honestly say that since reading “Unglued” I don’t go my own way as often as I used to. I have already changed some. There is much room for improvement though, and I would say that the most important issue that I am not going God’s way in is my believing that no matter the struggles of this path I’m on, they are for my own good, to bring me to a place only God can see for me. It’s very easy to get discouraged, and this is where I “go my own way” into a not as positive uplifting outlook. I need to work on this much more.
    Where is my life more self pleasing than God pleasing? If a stranger walked by my life and observed it, I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t walk away and immediately think “now there’s a God pleasing woman at work!” No matter what progress I’m making, there is always room to move closer to God, and I need to tirelessly pursue a better way every day.
    The idle words question is very hard for me, because this is the area of my life that is still causing me the most shame and regret. I still yell too much at my son. I yell way less than I used to, but in my heart I know I should never yell at him, so even one time a month is too much. I am so filled with sorrow about this issue in my life. I know that I need to regroup, and refocus, and fix my sights on this problem. Nothing else in my life will end up mattering to me if I destroy my relationship with my child.

  23. I have purchased Greater through amazon for the kindle and will be signing up to join you for the best OBS. :-)

  24. I was thinking of purchasing the book online thru barnes and noble and the more I thought about it, for a difference of 5, it was better to purchase the book Greater thru Proverbs 31. I am happy I did.

    I have loved the book Unglued. i still need to complete a couple of the last questions, but I can already see how I am making imperfect progress.

    Thanks Lysa for sharing.