Oct 30

Unglued,Week 6, Wednesday Assignment

 Unglued Assignment for Wednesday

Where is everyone?  You’ve been quiet.  haha, Don’t leave me yet, we still have to finish this study!

First read Chapter 12, It Isn’t All Bad.  Then answer this question:

Why is coming unglued not all bad?  I’d love for you to share this today.  Let me hear from you :)

 

Blog Hop Topic of the Week

Pick One, write a blog post, share it with us tomorrow, Thursday at The OBS Blog Hop.

*”Dear Lysa TerKeurst”

*Thoughts vs. Truth

*I Accept the Invitation to Imperfect Progess

I continue to be impressed and inspired by your blogs! Can’t wait to read this week!

Remember, each time you share your blog on the blog hop, you are entered to win a new blog design! Prize awarded January 7, 2012!

Melissa

Comments

  1. I am so grateful for this entire book and its message! These unglued moments have allowed me to dig deeper into why I come unglued and look at God’s gentle pushing to get me closer to the person he wants me to be. My need for approval and control have caused me to forget the needs of my family and those around me at times and push my wants to the top. While there is nothing wrong with taking care of myself, I have a job to do. An honorable and wonderful job. I love that my outlook has changed and so has my attitude. I am definitely working towards imperfect progress.

  2. I do regret being unglued so much of my life. I wish I had given my kids the benefit of a Christ-Centered mom. I wish I had been a Christ-Centered wife. I wish I had been the Christ-Centered Friend that my supporters deserved. But, I wasn’t.

    I was unglued. I screamed. I yelled. I fell apart. I failed. I wasn’t the mom, the wife, or the friend that I should have been… I can’t change the past, but I can be the better mom and the better friend. Thankfully, my kids and friends (and my Lord and Savior) still love me.

    I once was lost, but now am found… I thank you all for this study. I look forward to the next one.

    • Barbara Prince says:

      Is amazes me that Satan plays the same tapes in all of our minds! I’ve listen to the same messages for years and years. It’s time to once and for all let what is in the past be gone. To place it under the blood of Jesus. We have a fresh start. We have new information to succeed as we move forward. God bless you for your openness with this group. It does help others.

      • Jennifer N (OBS group leader) says:

        I agree with you both. So many ‘what if’s’ and yet, God’s grace is abundant. May we push forward to ‘do better’, to keep moving and not live in the past full of regrets. May we make each day better than the one before, with His help. Bless you all!

    • You never know when your words might be just what someone else needs to hear to lift them up. Thank you, Nancy, for your post. I needed that today!

  3. Coming Unglued at times has taught me how I am just a mere human and that in order to stay together must trust in God and yield to his teaching… Coming unglued has caused many situation’s in my life that could have been avoided had I sought the word God concerning the situation. I am thankful that I can use some of the biblical tools given in the Book to assist me in avoiding being Unglued and being more like Christ!
    :)

  4. Lynn Graham says:

    because it brings us closer to God.

  5. Sometimes coming unglued can bring us closer to God because it makes us take a look inside ourselves. It makes us examine our motives & reasons for coming unglued. What caused the unglued moment? What can we learn from this unglued moment? And what is God saying to us in this unglued moment? When we think about it, we see the possibilities for growth.

  6. Coming unglued isn’t all bad because it can:
    1) help to identify an internal problem or brokenness.
    2) bring us to God
    3) lead us to holiness

  7. Barbara Prince says:

    Now, coming unglued isn’t all bad because I have information, I have new weapons at my ready. I can take my unglued moments and examine the soft underbelly it has exposed. I can let God do some fixing. I can let God into my un-keep rooms, so he can tidy them up.
    Not just that, I can start seeing others more clearly. I can begin giving them more grace in their unglued moments. I can start giving grace more often then coming unglued. God is making a way for me to grow into His likeness.

  8. Oh goodness! I only read the first part of the chapter but am about to burst with this insight to share! 51/2 yrs ago I developed a constant pain issue called bilateral idiopathic neuralgia which means I have severe sensorary nerve pain on both sides (all throughout the pelvic & thigh region) and the underlying cause is unknown. Trust me, I have seen ALL the experts. If the underlying cause were to be diagnosed it might mean the end of debilitating chronic pain. If you are in pain or causing others pain because you are on your last emotional nerve just imagine if you took the time to diagnose the underlying cause. You and others could be relieved of debilitating chronic emotional pain! If you knew exactly what was going to set you off…you wouldn’t do that thing. If I knew that vacuuming was setting off my physical pain I would never allow myself to vacumn again! No matter how broke I was or how dirty the rug got…I would make sure it got done some other way. Unfortunately, I don’t have an alarm system that warns me that what is happening is going to set off pain and likely will never be able to eliminate the pain. So over the years I have to become a detective, put the time & energy into looking hard & carefully at what might be triggering pain and with God’s constant direction reduce those situations. I have learned many techniques to manage pain & take a cocktail of pain blockers/killers that make living possible for me. YOU might not be able to eliminate what causes you emotional pain but HAVE to learn techniques to manage it so you can live. It takes time and energy, AND it takes God. Ask God, no BEG God to shine His light on it so you have eyes to see where you are vulnerable, changes you can make for better spiritual health, ways you can build up rather than tear down. You may never be cured, in this life, but you can have better emotional health and contribute to building God’s Kingdom and adding weight to His glory. And you can learn to lean into Him daily for strength and endurance so that the pain is somewhat dulled. And you can learn to embrace your limitations as gifts from God. Trust me, I know it’s true.

    • Barbara Prince says:

      I know about pain. And you are right, if we knew the cause or if it were curable, we would get rid of it. Emotional pain hurts too. It hurts more deeply then physical pain and does more damage. We are learning a lot here. I pray that God give you insight into the cause of your pain. I pray that your doctors have wisdom. And I pray God healing for you.

    • Debra W. Frost says:

      Thank you so much Suzi, I can relate to chronic pain too. Your post was really a blessing to me!

  9. Jennifer N (OBS group leader) says:

    Why is coming unglued not all bad?

    Because it brings us closer to God. It humbles us and makes us realize that apart from Him we can do nothing. It makes us face issues within ourselves that have been ‘simmering’ and awaiting addressing. The ‘reasons’ for our Unglued moments.
    It also gives us empathy for others. To realize we are all broken, fallible humans. We love because He first loved us, we forgive because we have been forgiven, and we extend mercy and grace because He has richly given those to us.

  10. We survived the storm, some didn’t. Let’s pray for the 4 families in CT who lost loved ones. We’re still without power!

    • Jennifer N (OBS group leader) says:

      Praying for those families and praying that you all get power back on soon. May God comfort them all.

      • Barbara Prince says:

        Praying also for all those families who lost loved ones. Also all those without power. Praying God mercy.

  11. Coming unglued is not all bad because it often times leads me to a bible study such as this that will lead me to God’s word, which will ultimately give me specific directions for a situation I’m dealing with. I’ve been dealing with some hurt and unforgiveness that has been eating me alive. I’ve never had anything that has consumed me as this situation has. I’d been praying and seeking God’s word for an answer, but I was seeking with the wrong motive. I was not wanting to deal with the issue (me) but rather to be able to say “I forgive you, but I don’t want you all to exist in my life. This book has been such a revelation as to where my heart and mind has been. I’ve learned to face a situation and not stuff it. I’ve leaned to plan ahead what to do. I’ve learned to stop the negative chatter that was driving all my unforgiveness. I’ve learned many new ways to implement God’s word into action. I’m not a new believer, but I’m a good example of how you can teach an old dog new tricks. I’m praising God for breaking me down and building me back up. I’m dealing with the situation, and my heart is at peace. Thank you Lysa Terkerust for “Unglued” and for my OBS friends. I’ve made imperfect progress and coming unglued has not been a all bad! I praise you Father!!!!

    • Kelley V. (OBS Group Leader) says:

      Sharon,

      It is so good to read that you are dealing with your difficult situation and that your heart is at peace! What great progress! I, too, am a stuffer as well as an introvert, so I have to work hard at this as well. But it’s so freeing to actively deal with our issues with His guidance. So glad you’ve made such great progress! Blessings to you!
      Kelley

  12. I am so sad this study is coming to an end. :( It’s a good thing I singed up for Greater :) I must add, what an amazing book by Lysa. I am overjoyed not only that I stumbled across this book when I did, but that I also finished it!! Woo HOO! It also makes my heart smile to see how Lysa shares its ok to be “Unglued” some of the time. This book has more than helped my “Unglued” state of mind and I am so thankful I was able to join this study. Thank you Melissa, to you and your team for all of your hard work and efforts. I am blessed to now have this book in my library to refer back to as a reference. May everyone involved enjoy reading this book as much, if not more, than I did. Praying for the Proverbs 31 group today and always.

    HUGE Blessings from a single momma of two

  13. Carissa D. Huffman says:

    I really, really need to be reminded that the ugliness I am handed is the result of an underbelly of pain from another human being, who is loved by the Father, no matter what, just like me. This is a powerful thing.

    I really haven’t been seeing what my unglued moments are trying to show me about myself–I have been dwelling in the negative–>defensive cycle for WAY too long.

    I want to pursue HOLINESS–to accept and cherish that huge gift that Jesus shed His blood to give me, as part of my day-to-day life.

    Lord, help me to see myself and others more as You do. In Jesus’s Name. AMEN

    This is making an impact on my way of thinking–that means a lot!

    Carissa in eastern Iowa

    • Barbara Prince says:

      Carissa, I’m praying for you too. I’m praying that the great love the Father has for you will envelop you. I pray that you will be able to extend forgiveness, so that you can totally receive forgiveness. I pray that the sweet Holy Spirit wrap His arms around you so that you know how special you really are in the Father’s eyes.

  14. Why is coming unglued not all bad?

    Might our unglued places be like windowpanes of clear glass that give us an honest peek inside our souls (pg. 167)

    A well decorated life isn’t a sign of togetherness (pg. 168)

    …coming unglued may indicate a problem with our internal wiring. Outward expressions are internal indications. If our outward expressions are unglued, there’s some brokenness internally. Broken places we won’t address unless we are forced to acknowledge their existence. As painful as it might be to name these broken places, seeing ourselves — really seeing, deeply and honestly — is a very good thing. (pg. 168)

    Coming unglued isn’t all bad if it brings us to God. (pg. 169)

    …coming unglued is glorious if the end result of that brokenness leads us to holiness (pg. 169)

  15. Coming unglued has its benefits to help me come closer to God. To cling to Him for help and understanding. And to help me let go of the hurt. Through this book I have started to think of things differently in regards to my internal reactions. Since I tend to stuff the feelings to make it all peaceful, it helps to see that for what it is and let God help me find the truth. I pray that I will continue to make progress and to deal with situations that I used to deal with as “too emotional” as just right emotions in truth.

    Thank you Melissa for leading the Bible study! I have really enjoyed it and look forward to doing the Greater Bible study with you. May God bless you for all you do and the sacrifices you make to bring God to women all over the world!

  16. Hi Melissa, We are still here, meditating , trying to soak all this in and
    apply it to our lives- keeps us busy! Thank you for what you are doing!
    This week , I am trying to train my brain to pray BEFORE I start trying
    to figure something out! This was simple , but I feel like it will work
    so much better for me-give myself to God FIRST!

  17. If we use the unglued to identify triggers and how we can come closer to God unglued can be a good thing. There have been times when after coming unglued my first question was, [where did that come from and now]. The answer has been an awesome AHA and as my oldest daughter puts I it, a definite come to Jesus inner conversation. Some of my most effective learning sessions with our heavenly father have resulted. This study has been so God for me. While I have many baby steps to take I am making imperfect progress. Each post and blog I have read always seems to be just for me. We are so blessed. Can’t wait for tomorrows blog hop.

  18. I have a prayer request. Mon. I’m having echo of my heart to be followed shortly by a heart Cath shortly after. Seems I have a leaky valve. Grace and thanks to ASL.

    • Jennifer N (OBS group leader) says:

      Praying that all goes well and that He would guide the hands, hearts and minds of the doctors. God bless you!

  19. First of all, I want to say I ordered my Greater book on Saturday from Proverbs 31 and it came in the mail today! Very excited about that! :)

    And then: Why is coming unglued not all bad?

    Coming unglued brings our imperfections to light. It’s when they are brought to light that we can see we need to fix some things and that we can do so in a Godly way! If we continue to come unglued but not see our imperfections, we just keep falling deeper and deeper into sin. I don’t want to go deeper, I want to go higher! I want God to show me what I need to fix. That way I can grow closer to him, and become a better wife, and a better mother. After all, life isn’t about me, It’s about God. I want people to look at me and see God at all times. No matter the circumstance.

    This OBS has been such an incredible blessing to me! Imperfections have come to light for me throughout this whole book, and God is helping me daily to become a better woman! :)

  20. Why is coming unglued not all bad?

    Well, for one we get a look at our “under-bellies” a look of our most vulnerale parts. And hen we see that broken soft part it’s a place where we can meet God. That place is special. It is where we truly see the places that need to mended. When we reach thia place it makes seeing the issue and the problem areas a lot clearer. Thankfully its the one truly place I need to see God so he can help me with the places that need fixing.

  21. I really hate it when I become unglued..It is good to know that God forgives us.
    This bible study has given me some insight about my unglued behavior(s) and some things to try to prevent it or handle it when it happens…I see this as a life long process for me. But maybe as I grow older and wiser I will become less unglued and more Christ focused.

    • Jennifer N (OBS group leader) says:

      Just keep making imperfect progress…..keep drawing closer to Him…..keep depending on Him for ‘perfect progress’……wink. God bless you!

    • Barbara Prince says:

      Monika, I wish it just came with age. lol

  22. Coming from someone who has extreme anxiety, I think it is ok for me to come unglued. It allows me to remember that I am human and I do have emotions. If I keep all of them bottled up it is not healthy. I am able to lean on God when I come unglued.

  23. Kristen Barkdull says:

    I am sad that this study is coming to an end. I still have so much to learn when it comes to my unglued emotions. But I have the resources from this study, the book, dvd, and participants guide to continue helping me.

    Coming unglued is not all bad because it can show us things that we need to work on. It can help us learn what situations make us come the most unglued and how we can react in those situations.

    • christina t says:

      I’M SAD ALSO I’M GOING TO MISS THE COMMUNICATION BETWEEN EVERYONE TRYING AND PRAYING FOR ONE ANOTHER.

  24. Coming unglued is good if it brings us to our knees in prayer. Unfortunately in my life, despite my many post unglued prayers of repentance, I still repeat the same mistakes. This book has been great. It’s teaching me new things. However I still can’t seem to break the pattern. I still get angry and yell at my kids. I still can’t keep it together. I feel like I am the one person who just can’t overcome my shortcomings. This might be a lie from the pit of hell, but for so many years I have felt like a hamster on a wheel. I invite the Holy Spirit to invade my inner spaces, I pray for God to work on me, to release me from my bonds to my emotions. Yet, here I am, still a slave. What can I do differently?

    • Kelley V. (OBS Group Leader) says:

      Hi Ilissa,

      I love your words – coming unglued is good if it brings us to our knees in prayer. That is SO true! In reading your post, I related so well to what you wrote. But one comment made me think you’ve got some of that negative inside chatter going on when you state that you are the one person who just can’t overcome your shortcomings. But you’re a work in progress like the rest of us, right? You’ve made progress – imperfect progress, and are learning new things, new ways to address issues, new ways to look at things, etc. But make sure you hold your thoughts accountable – don’t over-analyze things that happen, just consider if each situation is better than the last similar situation…

      Another thing I’ve done is note some triggers for myself – are there certain times of the day when my temper seems the most likely to come out ugly; do certain people seem to bring out the worst in me; those type things. If you can identify some of these, then you can focus specifically on them. Like for me, I’m kind of like Lysa, after 8:00 or so at night, I am a lot more likely to lose my patience with my son. If I let him stay up later than usual, it doesn’t always turn out good. So I am more deliberate with sticking to a routine at night that ensures peace.

      I hope this helps. Please keep praying for God to lead you through these situations and unglued moments. I’ll say a prayer for you now. Thanks for posting – me writing this to you has helped me think through things for myself as well.

      Kelley V

      • Thank you for your support! I think the problem is that I have a hard time applying what I learn. My situations haven’t changed and they probably won’t. My kids drive me nuts and I have a very short temper. They know how to needle me until I explode all over them. Then they tell me to stop yelling! That only makes me more angry. I want to be able to react with calmness and to be able to take my thoughts captive before they leave my mouth. I wish I knew why I get so angry, why I harbor anger and negativity in my heart. Yes, I am a work in progress, but I wish for once I could react in a way that makes God proud of me.

  25. I’ve fallen behind on my reading this week. But I am still following along with everyone. : )

  26. Debra W. Frost says:

    Unglued is really working! what I am trying to say is lately I have been watching myself in different situations. My husband has really been driving me crazy for some reason, but I remembered instead of coming unglued, I watched myself
    saying calmly Jesus,Jesus,Jesus and I was definitely changing my attitude,my mouth,and I saw how Jesus turned everything out. Thank God for Proverbs31 ministry, the staff , and OBS leader Melissa !

  27. God has created everything in this world for a purpose, so it would stand to reason that my ‘unglued’ moments would be part of that creation! How like God to bring me closer to Him in those moments when I feel the farthest away. And as I grow in Christ I will see His hand in those unglued moments sooner and be able to bring those imperfect moments into submission with my perfect God!

  28. How is coming unglued not all bad?
    Because it has showed me that there are still hurts from the past that I haven’t dealt with or should I say say I can’t deal with, at least not alone. That I need to God to heal these hurts. I have also realized these past hurts have clouded my perspective, when someone says something negative or has an unglued moment themselves, that they don’t like me, they don’t want me, everything becomes personal. I hate feeling like this but now, because of my unglued moments and doing this study, I can look at my underbelly and say Lord I’m hurting. What do I do?

  29. christina t says:

    FIRST AND FOREMOST THANK YOU TO ALL THE DEDICATION FROM THE LADIES OF PROV.31! I WOULD NOT HAVE LEARNED MORE OF MYSELF WITHOUT THIS BOOK AND BECOME MORE OPEN AND AWARE OF HOW TO DEAL WITH MY FEELINGS AND EMOTIONS. WITHOUT GOD,THE BOOK UNGLUED,AND OBS I WOULDN’T HAVE KNOWN ANY OTHER WAY ON MY OWN. :) MY UNCLE JUST WROTE ME A LETTER WITHOUT KNOWING OF THIS STUDY AND TOLD ME TO READ PROV. 31 HE SAID.” TO UNDERSTAND WHAT GOD THINKS OF ME!” OH GOD IS GREAT! THANKS LYSA, AND MELISSA BEHIND IN THE STUDY BUT STILL READING STRONG! THANK YOU THANK YOU!

  30. christina t says:

    IT MAY BE OF SUBJECT BUT HAD TO GIVE SHOUT OUTS! :)

  31. Elaina Willard says:

    Okay, as much as I don’t want to agree – I have to. Being broken takes us to our knees – so we can go to God. This is why being unglued is not so bad. Did/do you ever have the negative chatter where you believed that “if they saw the REAL you, and then they wouldn’t/didn’t like you, much less love you”. I loved it when Lysa said that kind of thinking is a problem. There aren’t two me’s… It is true, if we believe God doesn’t accept part of us, then that would make God’s love unconditional. His is the only true – UNCONDITIONAL love. It amazes me, that she can point out so many things that appear to just be our way of thinking, but in fact are unrealities that we misconceived somewhere along the line, and now believe they are true.

    I really enjoy her view on Adam and Eve – wow , a whole new perspective. How awesome!

    This book has spoken to me during a very emotional time in my life, and has helped me see, and not come Unglued as often. And now when I do, I view it as imperfect progress.

  32. My life is like a puzzle. All the pieces interlocking, and holding each other in place. That’s good except the picture the puzzle shows isn’t perfect. Coming unglued shakes up the puzzle, and leaves spaces between the pieces. These spaces are where I can work and fill them in with God’s presence. Coming unglued allows me to have room to change, to see others in a manner more filled with grace, and to realize that my “picture perfect puzzle” life isn’t really so, until it’s God’s picture.

    • I thank you Melissa and all of the proverbs 31 ministries for a wonderful OBS . Coming unglued is not all that bad

  33. Hello Shelly, I like that! Coming unglued gives you a chance for room to change

  34. Sorry Melissa! I just started Chapter 9. Just fell so behind, I’m a bit disappointed in myself because you made the study so fun. You are a great encouraging leader!

  35. Why is coming unglued not all bad? It makes me realize that I have work to do on my inner self and need to spend more time with God and listen to Him more. I need to be less verbal and more watchful to see what it is that sets off my unglued moments. I am an exploder and “oh boy” do I explode. I say hurtful things to the grandkids and then I am sorry but words sting deeply and can never be retrieved and that is bad for all. The children are eleven and twelve and they have been with me since infants. I am the only “mom ” they have ever known and it is terrible to realize my words hurt and saying “I’m sorry” won’t stop that hurt. Emotional hurt is a different type of pain. It makes one think he/she is never good enough, cannot ever please, doesn’t know how to do things right, etc. Please pray for me that I will stop coming unglued and make imperfect progress in this area. I need to show Christ’s love to these little ones. They were abandoned by their mother and need to feel they are really, truly loved and wanted. I really needed to do this Bible study and will no doubt read the book many more times and continue in my unperfect progress. However, there is a good ending to this. I now realize that I am an exploder and I find myself keeping my mouth shut and waiting until I think it through to say anything if and when it needs to be said. I know they are little people and have feelings too. They need to be shown sometimes how to do things instead of leaving them to figure it out for themselves. They seem to have ears but don’t listen. They have “selective hearing” if you know what I mean. I really come unglued when I hear, “Oh, I forgot.” or “I didn’t hear you.” So my imperfect progress is slower than some but it is coming along. Thank you Melissa for your book. It has been a tremendous help to me and my family is also benefiting from my studying it too.

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